A SINGLE MOTHER

My Hub thinks I should ask my friend Flexi for some private lessons in Yoga? Ha. God, I would love to do that, but I think the days have gone when I could tie my legs around my neck? I can hardly tie my shoe laces, never mind anything else?

I am really really unfit though. I hate it I really wish I could afford a personal trainer? How lucky rich people are? Oh talking of rich, Teen annoyed me last night, as I served him a plate of food, he told me about the wonderful food Bunches was having and how much he hated what he was having.

I told him, I had made a huge pot of casserole the other day and he would not touch it, he had bought sandwiches instead. Bunches seems to have fresh fish every day in her life, with some leaves…

Well when teen eats at her house, he tells me how wonderful it was, and it is very very kind of Bunches Mum to allow teen to stay for tea, but he also comes home starving? Ha.

It’s really funny; he comes in the house,

“Wow, I have just had the best meal at Bunches house. We made it streight from the Jamie Oliver cook book. Tuner steaks with lentils.

It was delicious and for dessert, we had finely sliced strawberries, with Pecan nuts and Greek yoghurt! Mm.

God, I am starving, is there any food?”

Oh God, he was making his pack lunch this morning, one, streight on my work tops. I had just washed down. I asked him to use a plate or chopping board. He asked why? I told him, one, hygiene, two, he was slicing on my work tops, and three he leaves crumbs all over the surfaces and just goes to school, after me this morning at ten to eight, lifting things up off my worktops and washing then drying underneath.

Then when I asked him to wipe up? He moaned and used the flipping t/towel?

I said why did you not use a dishcloth, or some paper kitchen roll? He said, it’s only crumbs? I said, no, you were slicing ham on there, so now my towel I use to dry the dishes, has abstracts of ham on?

He replied, oh, Mum stop moaning…

T towel in the wash now I have again cleaned kitchen tops and who knows if there are scratches on there? I can’t feel any, but I bet you can see them? So people will look at my work tops and think, whatever you would think, but mainly, they look awful? I am oblivious to it? I bet tomorrow, he will do exactly the same?

I want to make his lunch, as half the mess, but no, he wants to do it, and I guess, this is good, as he also irons his clothes.

He was good yesterday though, he took Hubs keyboard to bits,  mind you, Hub was not nice about it, Teen entered the room to help and Hub walked out, complaining that he can’t bare being in the same room as teen. Oh I thought,  here we go again? But thank God, teen didn’t  hear Hub going off about teens presence though it would have hurt him, as he has said to me before, how he has noticed, that he walks into a room and Hub walks out?

Hub did say though thank you to teen…

I guess it would have been nice, if they had done the keyboard together, like Father and Son, but, they are not f & s, so never will be. That breaks my heart. This is why teen is so deeply sad in life. He really resents not having a Dad. I never wanted my child to feel unloved, this is why I was always over the top, but teen drives me  mad now and I just am sick of being a single parent. I mean yesterday Teen came in from school telling us he received an A *, in science. This is the best  mark possible. It is a test to go towards his final exam for science, but he got A’s and B’s for English then when it came to the actual exam, he flopped and failed. So pray to God or whoever, that he keeps his cool when it comes to science exam?

I so worry about him. In so many ways. I am glad he has found a family who except him and talk highly about him, of course, they don’t live with him? As Hub said the other day, teens manners, are impeccable and he can be the nicest person, but with us? A different story.

I can only say, I hope one day, Hub and Teen are allowed to find a mutual peace with each other? He can show only 1% of the love he has for his daughters, daughters who don’t  bother with him, never have, but you see, blood.

 I guess for me, blood is so important, as teen is my only blood, with being adopted though, I know you don’t have to share blood to love.

xxx