My dear Bloggets. I am amazed by your loyalty and delighted
to tell you that we have gone over the number of 30,000 views this year alone.
On January the first 2013, we got to the fantastic number of
six thousand views in four months and to me this was a miracle. And now look at
our ever growing family.
I am so grateful to you all. Showing an interest in what
some days seams a load of rubbish, as I still wonder what you all see in
reading about my simple life. I feel like we are growing together, learning
about life together and will remain friends and Blogget family members forever.
I really really believe in one day my map in life shall lead
me to a publisher who I will work with and be able to write my autobiography,
poems and children’s books. I pray for this. And with your help and support, I
hope to get there.
One day, I hope my life will have been worth living.
Thank you all and I send my love to you.
Thirty six thousand views in total, is to me, incredulous.
To celebrate, I would like to republish some of my favourite
blogs. So here goes!
IN THE BANK
Good morning my Bloggets, I hope this
finds you all well? If not, I pray you will feel better by the end of this, or
the end of the day?
It is six in the morning here. I just
can not have a night where I sleep more than two hours. I hate it, I dislike
bed immensely. My chest is tight and I am so stressed at the minute. Hub keeps
talking about the fact that he may lose his
job in the new year and though it would
mean he would be home and I would
see him and have a normal life, I do worry about finances. I also know he would
be just dreadfully unhappy not working, as he is a workaholic. He has so many qualifications and
three degrees diploma’s and so on but would really struggle in finding work.
Crazy, but being blind is not a good place to be when job hunting, it limits
ones choices. Then when he finds work that will be suitable, they say he is
over qualified for the job. I am 99% sure he will not be out of work, as he is
just too good at his job.
Well, after yesterday’s awful day,
where Hub and I woke up full of hell, both of us telling our friend we don’t
want to hear from him again and Hub getting very angry with teen, rightly so by
the way as teen was in the wrong, I have
calmed down a little and can see some fun in yesterday’s venture in the town.
It was an awful day the town was
packed of course it would be and we did get lost, but we did find the bank in
the end. God it was a nightmare though. I blooming hate being blind. Everything
is so difficult and stressful. Makes me wonder why we are punished in such a
way?
But when we did get to the bank, Hub
with his £300 coat on and a tatty old rucksack on his back, carrying a tub of coins
we have been saving for a year. Getting into the bank, via a book shop that had
a closed / locked door, being told by a what I was sure was a tramp, we were
trying to get into a locked book shop the right way for the bank, well, his
description was “up that way!” Very helpful, not. Bless him, at least he tried to help? Hahaha. Well when we found
the bank, an assistant told us the machine that counts your coins, was out of
order. Hub said “Well can you fix it?” They said no, I asked if someone could count
it by hand, I knew that would get a
reaction, she told us that the machine had been out of order for a
while, I thought that they were waiting for a specialist to fix it, oh, no,
they just needed someone to empty the thing. Someone from their bank, someone
called Dawn. Well, I asked will Dawn empty it?
The answer was, “Oh, well, I will ask her!” I thought, Please do, as we
are not leaving till we get rid of the brick in the bag.
Well we had some banking to do and
this poor girl could be heard in the background asking everyone if they could
empty the blooming machine? No one
wanted the job, not even Dawn, but in
the end after we did our finances, we told the rather stupid man who did not
know his left from his right, we would wait until we got our money in the
counting machine. In other words, we were there to stay.
Soon
Dawn came to the rescue and suddenly there was a blooming queue formed
at the machine that had been relieved.
Of course we needed help as there
were inaccessible buttons to push. Well a queue formed behind us, my Black
beauty had found a person to pet her as she was tied to my left hand and the
process began. The girl got down on the floor with my Hubs cheesy balls tin.
Hahahhahahah. Yep, we had took the money to the bank in a tin of what was
cheesy balls. The girl was on her knees laughing at that fact. It’s not every
day when you can say you took an empty
tin of cheesy balls to the bank!
Well, how stupid could the day get?
Rather. The machine threw out £2 coins. The girl looked up and said, “Oh, yes,
the machine never has liked £2 coins?” Why was that my Hub dared to ask,
considering we collected 80% £2 coins in our tin! Answer? Ready for it?
“Oh, well, some of them are shiny!”
“Right, that explains it!
Well then my lovely BB found the door
and I confidently found the right way to go, turning to the right for two steps, then thinking to myself,
“Fiona, what are you doing? So I then
let my Hub take over as I did not have a clue where to go. I don’t know how he
does it. There are no obvious kerbs or sounds in our town and the people from
guide dogs said they hardly train people to
do our town because of that reason.
Oh, God, bear with me, my Canary,
Irish of course, has just said good morning and though it is a gentle start to
the day he will find his voice after his cup of tea, well, his sip of water.
It is still dark but he is such a
happy little soul he sings in the dark too.
As we stepped outside the car and I inhaled the stunning fresh clean
Northumberland air, I knew I was home. Home to my beautiful an yet sad
historical land of belonging. A place where I grew up a very unhappy child, but
a place where I felt the most loved. For the next two days, no more bad air
from the fumes of cars and of my new place of living, but the salted sea air. A
man called Daniel, met us and gave us a guided tour around the beautiful house.
Oh if you could go there you like me would fall in love with the place. It's
not like a hotel, though it is a four star spa, it's home from home in a dream.
As we walked past the restaurant passing the cocktail bar and library, we were
shown the drawing room where Hub first brought me as his new bride three years
ago. The happiest day of my life. The beautiful furniture framed the stunning
hand crafted staircase, which one man made, carving lovingly exhibiting his
talents, as it took him eighteen months to perfect. As we passed through the
fragranced corridor, I of course asked what the beautiful smell was. It was not
fresh roses from the garden but plug in air fresheners. They were stunning I
wish we could buy them for our stinking beastie girls. We opened our heavy
solid wooden door and enjoyed the beautiful immaculate bedroom. Oh I ventured
into the bathroom and saw the fantastic spa bath. The luxury of the bed and
comfortable seating in the room was a good start to relax. Daniel was great
kind and helpful. We got a rough idea of our surroundings. We decided to do
Sunday lunch. Down into the restaurant. It was there where we met with Jane.
She was the waitress. What a character. Sadly for the hall, she is leaving this
Friday. She is off on a adventure of her own. All the way to India, to live.
She will be a real miss to the place because she was so jolly and at one with
the customers. Oh Bloggets, the meal was amazing The chef has won lots of
awards for his absolute skill. I had Roast onion soup with the most wonderful
melt in the mouth cheese biscuits. You know sometimes when you get home made
soup, the chef never puts enough salt in it? Well this was perfect and you
could taste the cream in it too. I had Sunday lunch without the meat and oh
wow, wonderful. Two huge Yorkshire puddings, roast potatoes and new potatoes
with herbs and butter. Red cabbage and parsnips. Carrots and other veg. Hub had
a fish starter and the Sunday lunch with pork. That came with the cracknel off
the pork. Then he had a white chocolate with berries. A dark chocolate mint
straw and wafers. I had a cheese board. You got loads of cheese, celery grapes
and seven different crackers. Butter in a silver tiny round dish with a cute
lid. Home made chutney too. Then we had coffee. All for a little over £40. For
both of us. Oh and I drank gallons of lovely clean fresh water. Water without
lime scale. We went rather full to our rooms, took a rest, then strolled in to
the gardens and took a seat on the veranda. We were in a room named after a
north Umbrian village. It was given to us because it was very close to the door
out to the back of the hotel. Perfect for walking LC. Oh now then, that was a
funny story, we headed for the door, we were told that we should push a button
to open the door, but one of us would have to stand at the door, because it would
lock after us… Hahaha. I was the person who was the door keeper. First though
we had to open it without setting off the fire alarm. We were told the button
was close to it so be careful, as the girl on reception chuckled. She asked if
we wanted someone to come and assist us. We said no as we like a challenge. Hub
could not find the button. I thought he had found a window rather than a
blooming door. But he hadn't it was the door. I took over telling him, to move
a side and let the professional door opener in. Scared to hear that sound you
don't want to hear on your first day in such a fine place. The sound of the
horn which brings the fire engines out. We heard a click and realised our door
was about to open. Just as it did, I with joy, pushed it wide open and lead hub
out, keeping hold of the cheeky door which was dying to close on us. I acted
all smart, laughing with Hub as I said I was the one who opened the door. Just
then, I almost went flying down the unsuspected step down into the court yard.
Few, that was close! Haha Imagine what we looked like to anyone watching? A
door opens and falling out of it is a fat blind lass, with a guy and a guide
dog… Haha. Then time for evening meal. Oh really I was not at all hungry, but
the food was again, delicious. For dessert, I had home made ice cream. My BF,
would have jumped over twelve Nana's to get to it. It was rum and raison and
plain. But allow me to assure you, there was nothing plain about that ice
cream. Hub had the cheese board, but that was different to mine through the
day. More exotic cheeses. He had duck too. And said it was the very best duck
he had ever had. He had soup for starters but I did not fancy that as it had a
poached egg in it… Too weird, though again, he said it was simply stunning. Well
then we entered into the cocktail bar. Laughing about one of the waiters who
was there three years ago and I am sure, bless him, he was the tart man,
remember I told you about him? You can't? well, he was a young new starter and
I ordered a delicious fruit tart. He came with it to me and placed it on the
table. He said those words to me, the words a lady does not want to hear.
"Tart. I answered "I beg your pardon? Hahaha. Who was he calling a
tart? He is a sweet guy and so helpful too. Oh but as we sat in the bar, we
ordered our cocktail, and it sounded really nice. Mine had rum, lime and other
interesting things in it as well as soda and mint. Now then, between the bar
lady and the waiter who helped her, this is how the conversation went. Bar
person "Can you go to the kitchen and get me some mint please. Waiter,
"Some what, mint? Bar person "Yes, some mint. Waiter "What was
that, mint? Bar person "Yes mint. One minute later, Waiter "The
kitchen didn't have any mint. Bar person well I shall get it from down stairs.
Well when the drinks came, I tasted it and turned to hub and said "Mmm,
can you taste the mint? So now that is known as Mint gate. Well, then to our
room and into the shower, to play the game of "Guess what bottle we are
using ? Was it shampoo, conditioner, shower gel? Or anything else. I just
washed my hair until it got foamy. Went to bed and phoned Teen before bed, to
see if A, he was in and B, how he and the dogs were. The next day, we ventured
out to breakfast. Again, a lovely breakfast/meal. They even gave me some
vegetarian sausage with my tomato, potatoes and mushrooms. Hub had the lot I am
talking, full Northumbrian as they called it. Beans tomatoes potatoes,
scrambled eggs, bacon, mushrooms and fried bread There was toast and more. As
much tea and coffee as you wished for. Then into the drawing room to chill and
off to the swimming pool where again, the pool man, gave us a guided tour. We
enjoyed the water and then into the spa pool too. We didn't do a treatment this
time. But we felt so fresh and happy. Back to our room then after a shower and
check up with the decorating, we went for afternoon tea. I had lemon and ginger
tea, Hub had normal. I had two kinds of sandwiches and cream scones. Home made
jam and clotted cream, for the scones. Then there was yummy cakes. Ginger,
cream tart with strawberries and a chocolate brownie. Again well fed. A chat
with the friendly staff and back to our room for a snooze. Before we knew it,
time again for our evening meal. It was interesting to listen to the people in
the drawing room, talking about the beautiful places the had been. The coast
around there, is known as the sugar sands. As it is so white and wonderful. A
lady told in a very posh voice she had visited all of the castles and other
historical places of interest. The reception of the house, / spar. Is the
original. The rest, took the past owner eighteen months to build. Then his wife
developed cancer so he sold the building for six million. He gave all the money
to cancer charity. The original part of the house, used to be an old peoples
home, so when the owner bought it, he kindly flew in via helicopter, Local fish
and chips for all the OAP's. He sounds a great person and thank God, his wife
is still fine and well. The sounds of the birds, trees hushing in the gentle
breeze and through the night, one could hear the foxes calling. I imagined how
it would be if this was my life now. All the grounds to explore. Ladies to
clean our house and my own chef… Then friendly approachable staff like Lee, who
came to try to help my lap top to recover. He was so funny. He came to our room
and stood and watched me walk across the room collecting things to assist him
with my unwell little techno troubles. He told me he was enjoying watching how
I went about things in the room. Hahaha. That was funny, as loads of people
watch us. When we were escorted in the restaurant, to our table, the constant
chatting, went so quiet. People don't know they are doing it, sometimes I would
love to stand and make a speech, saying Yes, guys, we eat too you know? Hahaha.
At least Lee had the honesty to tell us he was watching… Oh well glad to
provide some kind of show. What a nice guy he was. If I could just get you to
go there for one night and day, you too would fall in love with the peaceful
paradise of Doxford Hall. Next chapter tomorrow. x
Posted by Fiona Cummings
I find it so cute how he has a volume
control on him, how he starts off so quiet and at nights he is quiet too but
through the day, he is ear splitting.
He has a volume control, but only he
can control it. Sadly. Not us!
Anyway, back on track, we found our
bus stop really well. Hub was great, then we were told by a very nice lady that
our bus was there as she asked us what number we were waiting for. She got on
the bus after us and sat behind us. She was talkative and very nice, though
deaf.
We could tell in the way she spoke that she could not hear and she turned
right around to chat with me, as though to read my lips. It was rather odd
though this face appearing from nowhere, upon my shoulder.
But she was so lovely as are most of
the people in our town. The bus drivers are really lovely. Where I used to live
in Northumberland, the drivers were just dreadful. They had their personality
and brains removed at birth. Though the people back home, were the best.
So we got back safely to have a row
with our teen that was a bad ending to the rather stressful day, but at least
we managed to do to some what would be an easy task.
And we brought our cheesy ball tin
back to start the saving for another year.
I woke up in my Husbands arms. Always
a good start. He gently said to me,
“I’m so glad you have woke at this point?” I thought, I
have woke up, but I am not awake. I
smelt the darkness from the window above our heads. I asked still in slumber,
why was he glad I awoke? He told me to listen. I did, I thought it was our
Canary, Irish, of course! Then I heard it sing a song of pure winter icicles.
Hub whispered to me it was a a Christmas robin. My dear Mums favourite bird. Oh
the song was delightful. What a sound, what a song? What a start to a Christmas
day?
I smiled and we fell asleep for
another hour then all woke up together. Hub took a shower as I had another five
minutes on the Crisp Christmas morn.
Then Teen came into our room and Hub
shouted from downstairs, “He’s been!” Yes, Santa knew of our new address as we
were not here last Christmas.
Hub came back upstairs and we opened
our stockings together.
Oh, so many chocolates and candy.
Lots of nice smellies and silly little gifts. But the best thing in my
stocking, was a werewolf bear! Hub put it there helping Santa out of course, as
he loves helpers, as he is a busy man. Hub told me he bought two, but he could
not remember which one was pink, and which one was blue. Teen got the pink one.
Hahahahahaha. I said I would swap it but
teen loves pinks so hay ho!
You squeeze it’s hand and he howls
and lights up. Hahahahah. From our local shop, I am sure left over from
Halloween, but so cute.
So after seeing what Santa had filled our stockings with, it was
time
to move on downstairs. Oh from the wonderful
day I had the day before, with preparing
the Christmas dinner and getting the table ready for our Christmas lunch,
talking to my borrowed American Mum and stolen Dad who are still on holiday in
Mexico and my best friend on the phone, I had a lovely Christmas eve and now it
was time to enjoy the day.
Wow, it was great. I got the best
gifts. I loved everything, my mad aunt had bought her funny offering for Hub,
some crazy boxers. Teen had the house smelling like a cosmetic store and I got
the most lovely black leather gloves from my little boy for when I am training
with my new puppy and Hub ruined me with amazing perfumes and an IPod. Oh help
me out here? I am rubbish with technology so see how I go with touch screen,
that scares me. Oh I got the most
beautiful scarf from my American/English parents. My borrowed US Mum and English husband. My friend got me
a stunning ornament of a carousel horse on a plinth. The colours are cream,
turquoise and pink. Oh, I love it so much. My teen was delighted with his new
IPhone and first razor. He only needs to shave once a week with him being so
blonde, but Hub felt proud to have given him it. Teens natural father, my X,
phoned the teen to try and spoil his day, it could have done if I had not
calmly shown my teen some love, I did and we all had lunch and pulled crackers
and wore our silly hats from the crackers, Teen told the silly jokes from the
crackers and we had some delicious Bucks Fizz. Oh we ate till we hurt, ha.
Watched some great Christmas films
and when a tiny bit of room was discovered in our stomachs, we put some
chocolates in there. It was lovely.
I put my lovely new slippers on and
candles were lit and what a lovely day.
My teen was upstairs for ages
I asked him what he was doing, he replied he was cleaning his sink……why?
So he could put all of his products on the tiles around the sink. Well later
when I checked it, he had cleaned all the surrounding tiles around the sink and
placed his Christmas stuff on there but his actual sink? OMG?
A row in the street was heard about a
teen who had took three hours to get ready to go to relatives, hahahaha. But
apart from that, a beautiful day.
My favourite poem.
Life goes on By Fiona Cummings
A beautiful butterfly Chose not
to fly
In stead With wings of red Kissed
the sky
He sat in a treetop Catching a
raindrop
On a fragranced bloom Like on an
air balloon
Waiting for take off Along came
beside him a moth
Before I could blink An owl did wink
Then a tiny finch
Took the last space on the branch
he did pinch
Sitting there I wondered why
Then the heavens opened straight
from the sky
I ran under
a tree And tried to hide
Under huge
yellow leaves
Watching
fingers opening From the hands of the trees
As though
drinking fine wine
Were the
oaks and the pine
Relief from the
sun I guess it can’t be fun
All day in
the burning heat
Rain must be
a treat
A starling
washes his feet
In a nearby
puddle
A lady
fights with an umbrella Getting herself into a muddle
I wanted to
shout and tell her To come and share my tree
My dry house
Where there’s no need for a key
As these
trees have history And a good memory
y Secrets they keep to themselves
Till the day
they die
and become
shelves
Then books
are placed on them
And they
live on As nature intends
For all our animal
friends
Inside out and upside down
My sunny smile is now a frown
Ripped to shreds
Taking to my bed
Live in silence not a sound
A spinning world
A lonely girl
Veins bleed from the cut glass
Painful pockets form a cast
Around my mind
Light I can not find
I want to unwind
But the noose is getting tighter
I want to feel lighter
But hell weighs me to the ground
Crushed by life’s acid drops
Like a season of flooded crops
Poison flows
Dripping in through my cuts
Though the pain does not show
To be happy is a must
I ache to dream of summer days
I try but it’s all a haze
CUMMINGS
In the arms of an angel
I was lifted high
His kiss is like ice
Fresh from the sky
tears turn into crystals
I don’t know how or why
Clouds formed soft cushions below
Like a magical marshmallow pillow
The sun turned the snow into fresh
milk
And where we landed was ribbons of
silk
We ate winter berries
And pink little fairies
Danced to my angel playing a harp
Stones and rocks became like
chocolate drops
Not at all rugged and sharp
Frozen grass blades blew in the
breaze
Blooms of yellows grew on the trees
The ice capped rivers melted so blue
Echoed words whispered “I love you
I wanted to ask my angel what was his
name
He was so perfect like a picture in a
frame
I looked into his eyes
but they were not there
though I just knew he had a see
through stare
I read his face
He wanted to care
I touched his heart
He would always be there
But we had to part
Though only in sight
He taught me a lesson
To keep up the fight
He said I had to go on
Though my suffering would not last
too long
As he would clear the pathway for me
To help me to see
What is the best route to go
Shovelling up the snow
Sweeping away the autumn leaves
Clearing the overgrown foliage from
summer
And sleeping daffodils from spring
Hearing clear sounds of the church
bells which ring
e of seeing within
Souls from the past and friends who
will last
Knowing what to say each and every
day
Oh I will never forget the time we flew away
TEARS FOR MUM BY FIONA CUMMINGS
A tear falls as an ending has
occurred
In so much pain it’s so absurd
Lessons we have learned
Words we have heard
Your free now
Like a released dove
Surrounded by memories of how much
you were loved
I hurt so much inside
You have no idea the tears I have
cried
A fire burns deep
Though the wounds I hide
I have nowhere to place a flower
Or put a card
So these words are for you
And to write is so hard
But to feel is easy
So much I wished I had chance to say
to you
Like I love you
And thank you
To tell you that you are beautiful
How I think you were wonderful
And because of you I went so far
One person who is so missed
I say you, are
I wish you had stayed
I pray memories never fade
As you are the route to my life
The beat to my heart
My daily start
But my night time thought
Is with you I fought
But we could never be enemies
Because you were my family
My doting Mam
Because of you, is who I am
I wished you had never gone away
Where ever you are I pray
You have your life now
For you must live
Because when you were here
You only knew how to give
I love you Mam with all of my heart
Until we meet again
I must live through us being apart
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