translate

Tuesday, 3 December 2013

MEMORIES AND OUR FUTURE. (WE DID IT)


My dear Bloggets. I am amazed by your loyalty and delighted to tell you that we have gone over the number of 30,000 views this year alone.

On January the first 2013, we got to the fantastic number of six thousand views in four months and to me this was a miracle. And now look at our ever growing family.

I am so grateful to you all. Showing an interest in what some days seams a load of rubbish, as I still wonder what you all see in reading about my simple life. I feel like we are growing together, learning about life together and will remain friends and Blogget family members forever.

I really really believe in one day my map in life shall lead me to a publisher who I will work with and be able to write my autobiography, poems and children’s books. I pray for this. And with your help and support, I hope to get there.

One day, I hope my life will have been worth living.

Thank you all and I send my love to you.

Thirty six thousand views in total, is to me, incredulous.

To celebrate, I would like to republish some of my favourite blogs. So here goes!

 

IN THE BANK

 

Good morning my Bloggets, I hope this finds you all well? If not, I pray you will feel better by the end of this, or the end of the day?

 

It is six in the morning here. I just can not have a night where I sleep more than two hours. I hate it, I dislike bed immensely. My chest is tight and I am so stressed at the minute. Hub keeps talking about the fact that he may lose his  job in the new year and though it would  mean  he would be home and I would see him and have a normal life, I do worry about finances. I also know he would be just dreadfully unhappy not working, as he is a  workaholic. He has so many qualifications and three degrees diploma’s and so on but would really struggle in finding work. Crazy, but being blind is not a good place to be when job hunting, it limits ones choices. Then when he finds work that will be suitable, they say he is over qualified for the job. I am 99% sure he will not be out of work, as he is just too good at his job.

 

Well, after yesterday’s awful day, where Hub and I woke up full of hell, both of us telling our friend we don’t want to hear from him again and Hub getting very angry with teen, rightly so by the way as  teen was in the wrong, I have calmed down a little and can see some fun in yesterday’s venture in the town.

 

It was an awful day the town was packed of course it would be and we did get lost, but we did find the bank in the end. God it was a nightmare though. I blooming hate being blind. Everything is so difficult and stressful. Makes me wonder why we are punished in such a way?

 

But when we did get to the bank, Hub with his £300 coat on and a tatty old rucksack on his back, carrying a tub of coins we have been saving for a year. Getting into the bank, via a book shop that had a closed / locked door, being told by a what I was sure was a tramp, we were trying to get into a locked book shop the right way for the bank, well, his description was “up that way!” Very helpful, not. Bless him, at least  he tried to help? Hahaha. Well when we found the bank, an assistant told us the machine that counts your coins, was out of order. Hub said “Well can you fix it?” They said no, I asked if someone could count it by hand, I knew that would get a  reaction, she told us that the machine had been out of order for a while, I thought that they were waiting for a specialist to fix it, oh, no, they just needed someone to empty the thing. Someone from their bank, someone called Dawn. Well, I asked will Dawn empty it?  The answer was, “Oh, well, I will ask her!” I thought, Please do, as we are not leaving till we get rid of the brick in the bag.

 

Well we had some banking to do and this poor girl could be heard in the background asking everyone if they could empty the  blooming machine? No one wanted the job, not even  Dawn, but in the end after we did our finances, we told the rather stupid man who did not know his left from his right, we would wait until we got our money in the counting machine. In other words, we were there to stay.

 

Soon  Dawn came to the rescue and suddenly there was a blooming queue formed at the machine that had been relieved.

 

Of course we needed help as there were inaccessible buttons to push. Well a queue formed behind us, my Black beauty had found a person to pet her as she was tied to my left hand and the process began. The girl got down on the floor with my Hubs cheesy balls tin. Hahahhahahah. Yep, we had took the money to the bank in a tin of what was cheesy balls. The girl was on her knees laughing at that fact. It’s not every day when you can say you took an empty  tin of cheesy balls to the bank!

 

Well, how stupid could the day get? Rather. The machine threw out £2 coins. The girl looked up and said, “Oh, yes, the machine never has liked £2 coins?” Why was that my Hub dared to ask, considering we collected 80% £2 coins in our tin! Answer? Ready for it?

 

“Oh, well, some of them are shiny!”

 

 “Right, that explains it!

 

Well then my lovely BB found the door and I confidently found the right way to go, turning to the right for two  steps, then thinking to myself,

 

“Fiona, what are you doing? So I then let my Hub take over as I did not have a clue where to go. I don’t know how he does it. There are no obvious kerbs or sounds in our town and the people from guide dogs said they hardly train people to  do our town because of that reason.

 

Oh, God, bear with me, my Canary, Irish of course, has just said good morning and though it is a gentle start to the day he will find his voice after his cup of tea, well, his sip of water.

 

It is still dark but he is such a happy little soul he sings in the dark too.

 

As we stepped outside the car and I inhaled the stunning fresh clean Northumberland air, I knew I was home. Home to my beautiful an yet sad historical land of belonging. A place where I grew up a very unhappy child, but a place where I felt the most loved. For the next two days, no more bad air from the fumes of cars and of my new place of living, but the salted sea air. A man called Daniel, met us and gave us a guided tour around the beautiful house. Oh if you could go there you like me would fall in love with the place. It's not like a hotel, though it is a four star spa, it's home from home in a dream. As we walked past the restaurant passing the cocktail bar and library, we were shown the drawing room where Hub first brought me as his new bride three years ago. The happiest day of my life. The beautiful furniture framed the stunning hand crafted staircase, which one man made, carving lovingly exhibiting his talents, as it took him eighteen months to perfect. As we passed through the fragranced corridor, I of course asked what the beautiful smell was. It was not fresh roses from the garden but plug in air fresheners. They were stunning I wish we could buy them for our stinking beastie girls. We opened our heavy solid wooden door and enjoyed the beautiful immaculate bedroom. Oh I ventured into the bathroom and saw the fantastic spa bath. The luxury of the bed and comfortable seating in the room was a good start to relax. Daniel was great kind and helpful. We got a rough idea of our surroundings. We decided to do Sunday lunch. Down into the restaurant. It was there where we met with Jane. She was the waitress. What a character. Sadly for the hall, she is leaving this Friday. She is off on a adventure of her own. All the way to India, to live. She will be a real miss to the place because she was so jolly and at one with the customers. Oh Bloggets, the meal was amazing The chef has won lots of awards for his absolute skill. I had Roast onion soup with the most wonderful melt in the mouth cheese biscuits. You know sometimes when you get home made soup, the chef never puts enough salt in it? Well this was perfect and you could taste the cream in it too. I had Sunday lunch without the meat and oh wow, wonderful. Two huge Yorkshire puddings, roast potatoes and new potatoes with herbs and butter. Red cabbage and parsnips. Carrots and other veg. Hub had a fish starter and the Sunday lunch with pork. That came with the cracknel off the pork. Then he had a white chocolate with berries. A dark chocolate mint straw and wafers. I had a cheese board. You got loads of cheese, celery grapes and seven different crackers. Butter in a silver tiny round dish with a cute lid. Home made chutney too. Then we had coffee. All for a little over £40. For both of us. Oh and I drank gallons of lovely clean fresh water. Water without lime scale. We went rather full to our rooms, took a rest, then strolled in to the gardens and took a seat on the veranda. We were in a room named after a north Umbrian village. It was given to us because it was very close to the door out to the back of the hotel. Perfect for walking LC. Oh now then, that was a funny story, we headed for the door, we were told that we should push a button to open the door, but one of us would have to stand at the door, because it would lock after us… Hahaha. I was the person who was the door keeper. First though we had to open it without setting off the fire alarm. We were told the button was close to it so be careful, as the girl on reception chuckled. She asked if we wanted someone to come and assist us. We said no as we like a challenge. Hub could not find the button. I thought he had found a window rather than a blooming door. But he hadn't it was the door. I took over telling him, to move a side and let the professional door opener in. Scared to hear that sound you don't want to hear on your first day in such a fine place. The sound of the horn which brings the fire engines out. We heard a click and realised our door was about to open. Just as it did, I with joy, pushed it wide open and lead hub out, keeping hold of the cheeky door which was dying to close on us. I acted all smart, laughing with Hub as I said I was the one who opened the door. Just then, I almost went flying down the unsuspected step down into the court yard. Few, that was close! Haha Imagine what we looked like to anyone watching? A door opens and falling out of it is a fat blind lass, with a guy and a guide dog… Haha. Then time for evening meal. Oh really I was not at all hungry, but the food was again, delicious. For dessert, I had home made ice cream. My BF, would have jumped over twelve Nana's to get to it. It was rum and raison and plain. But allow me to assure you, there was nothing plain about that ice cream. Hub had the cheese board, but that was different to mine through the day. More exotic cheeses. He had duck too. And said it was the very best duck he had ever had. He had soup for starters but I did not fancy that as it had a poached egg in it… Too weird, though again, he said it was simply stunning. Well then we entered into the cocktail bar. Laughing about one of the waiters who was there three years ago and I am sure, bless him, he was the tart man, remember I told you about him? You can't? well, he was a young new starter and I ordered a delicious fruit tart. He came with it to me and placed it on the table. He said those words to me, the words a lady does not want to hear. "Tart. I answered "I beg your pardon? Hahaha. Who was he calling a tart? He is a sweet guy and so helpful too. Oh but as we sat in the bar, we ordered our cocktail, and it sounded really nice. Mine had rum, lime and other interesting things in it as well as soda and mint. Now then, between the bar lady and the waiter who helped her, this is how the conversation went. Bar person "Can you go to the kitchen and get me some mint please. Waiter, "Some what, mint? Bar person "Yes, some mint. Waiter "What was that, mint? Bar person "Yes mint. One minute later, Waiter "The kitchen didn't have any mint. Bar person well I shall get it from down stairs. Well when the drinks came, I tasted it and turned to hub and said "Mmm, can you taste the mint? So now that is known as Mint gate. Well, then to our room and into the shower, to play the game of "Guess what bottle we are using ? Was it shampoo, conditioner, shower gel? Or anything else. I just washed my hair until it got foamy. Went to bed and phoned Teen before bed, to see if A, he was in and B, how he and the dogs were. The next day, we ventured out to breakfast. Again, a lovely breakfast/meal. They even gave me some vegetarian sausage with my tomato, potatoes and mushrooms. Hub had the lot I am talking, full Northumbrian as they called it. Beans tomatoes potatoes, scrambled eggs, bacon, mushrooms and fried bread There was toast and more. As much tea and coffee as you wished for. Then into the drawing room to chill and off to the swimming pool where again, the pool man, gave us a guided tour. We enjoyed the water and then into the spa pool too. We didn't do a treatment this time. But we felt so fresh and happy. Back to our room then after a shower and check up with the decorating, we went for afternoon tea. I had lemon and ginger tea, Hub had normal. I had two kinds of sandwiches and cream scones. Home made jam and clotted cream, for the scones. Then there was yummy cakes. Ginger, cream tart with strawberries and a chocolate brownie. Again well fed. A chat with the friendly staff and back to our room for a snooze. Before we knew it, time again for our evening meal. It was interesting to listen to the people in the drawing room, talking about the beautiful places the had been. The coast around there, is known as the sugar sands. As it is so white and wonderful. A lady told in a very posh voice she had visited all of the castles and other historical places of interest. The reception of the house, / spar. Is the original. The rest, took the past owner eighteen months to build. Then his wife developed cancer so he sold the building for six million. He gave all the money to cancer charity. The original part of the house, used to be an old peoples home, so when the owner bought it, he kindly flew in via helicopter, Local fish and chips for all the OAP's. He sounds a great person and thank God, his wife is still fine and well. The sounds of the birds, trees hushing in the gentle breeze and through the night, one could hear the foxes calling. I imagined how it would be if this was my life now. All the grounds to explore. Ladies to clean our house and my own chef… Then friendly approachable staff like Lee, who came to try to help my lap top to recover. He was so funny. He came to our room and stood and watched me walk across the room collecting things to assist him with my unwell little techno troubles. He told me he was enjoying watching how I went about things in the room. Hahaha. That was funny, as loads of people watch us. When we were escorted in the restaurant, to our table, the constant chatting, went so quiet. People don't know they are doing it, sometimes I would love to stand and make a speech, saying Yes, guys, we eat too you know? Hahaha. At least Lee had the honesty to tell us he was watching… Oh well glad to provide some kind of show. What a nice guy he was. If I could just get you to go there for one night and day, you too would fall in love with the peaceful paradise of Doxford Hall. Next chapter tomorrow. x

Posted by Fiona Cummings

 

I find it so cute how he has a volume control on him, how he starts off so quiet and at nights he is quiet too but through the day, he is ear splitting.

 

He has a volume control, but only he can control it. Sadly. Not us!

 

Anyway, back on track, we found our bus stop really well. Hub was great, then we were told by a very nice lady that our bus was there as she asked us what number we were waiting for. She got on the bus after us and sat behind us. She was talkative and very nice, though deaf.

 

We could tell in the way she  spoke that she could not hear and she turned right around to chat with me, as though to read my lips. It was rather odd though this face appearing from nowhere, upon my shoulder.

 

But she was so lovely as are most of the people in our town. The bus drivers are really lovely. Where I used to live in Northumberland, the drivers were just dreadful. They had their personality and brains removed at birth. Though the people back home, were the best.

 

So we got back safely to have a row with our teen that was a bad ending to the rather stressful day, but at least we managed to do to some what would be an easy task.

 

And we brought our cheesy ball tin back to start the saving for another year.

 

 

I woke up in my Husbands arms. Always a good start. He gently said to me,

 

“I’m so glad  you have woke at this point?” I thought, I have woke  up, but I am not awake. I smelt the darkness from the window above our heads. I asked still in slumber, why was he glad I awoke? He told me to listen. I did, I thought it was our Canary, Irish, of course! Then I heard it sing a song of pure winter icicles. Hub whispered to me it was a a Christmas robin. My dear Mums favourite bird. Oh the song was delightful. What a sound, what a song? What a start to a Christmas day?

 

I smiled and we fell asleep for another hour then all woke up together. Hub took a shower as I had another five minutes on the Crisp Christmas morn.

 

Then Teen came into our room and Hub shouted from downstairs, “He’s been!” Yes, Santa knew of our new address as we were not here last Christmas.

 

Hub came back upstairs and we opened our stockings together.

 

Oh, so many chocolates and candy. Lots of nice smellies and silly little gifts. But the best thing in my stocking, was a werewolf bear! Hub put it there helping Santa out of course, as he loves helpers, as he is a busy man. Hub told me he bought two, but he could not remember which one was pink, and which one was blue. Teen got the pink one. Hahahahahaha. I said  I would swap it but teen loves pinks so hay ho!

 

You squeeze it’s hand and he howls and lights up. Hahahahah. From our local shop, I am sure left over from Halloween, but so cute.

 

So after seeing what  Santa had filled our stockings with, it was time 

 

 to move on downstairs. Oh from the wonderful day  I had the day before, with preparing the Christmas dinner and getting the table ready for our Christmas lunch, talking to my borrowed American Mum and stolen Dad who are still on holiday in Mexico and my best friend on the phone, I had a lovely Christmas eve and now it was time to enjoy the day.

 

Wow, it was great. I got the best gifts. I loved everything, my mad aunt had bought her funny offering for Hub, some crazy boxers. Teen had the house smelling like a cosmetic store and I got the most lovely black leather gloves from my little boy for when I am training with my new puppy and Hub ruined me with amazing perfumes and an IPod. Oh help me out here? I am rubbish with technology so see how I go with touch screen, that scares me. Oh I got  the most beautiful scarf from my American/English parents. My borrowed  US Mum and English husband. My friend got me a stunning ornament of a carousel horse on a plinth. The colours are cream, turquoise and pink. Oh, I love it so much. My teen was delighted with his new IPhone and first razor. He only needs to shave once a week with him being so blonde, but Hub felt proud to have given him it. Teens natural father, my X, phoned the teen to try and spoil his day, it could have done if I had not calmly shown my teen some love, I did and we all had lunch and pulled crackers and wore our silly hats from the crackers, Teen told the silly jokes from the crackers and we had some delicious Bucks Fizz. Oh we ate till we hurt, ha.

 

Watched some great Christmas films and when a tiny bit of room was discovered in our stomachs, we put some chocolates in there. It was lovely.

 

I put my lovely new slippers on and candles were lit and what a lovely day.

 

My teen was upstairs  for ages  I asked him what he was doing, he replied he was cleaning his sink……why? So he could put all of his products on the tiles around the sink. Well later when I checked it, he had cleaned all the surrounding tiles around the sink and placed his Christmas stuff on there but his actual sink? OMG?

 

A row in the street was heard about a teen who had took three hours to get ready to go to relatives, hahahaha. But apart from that, a beautiful day.

 

 

 

My favourite poem.       

 

Life goes on By Fiona Cummings

 A beautiful butterfly Chose not to fly

 In stead With wings of red Kissed the sky

 He sat in a treetop Catching a raindrop

 On a fragranced bloom Like on an air balloon

 Waiting for take off Along came beside him a moth

 Before I could blink An owl did   wink

 Then a tiny finch

 Took the last space on the branch

 he did pinch

 Sitting there I wondered why

 Then the heavens opened straight from the sky

 I ran under a tree And tried to hide

 Under huge yellow leaves

 Watching fingers opening From the hands of the trees

 As though drinking fine wine

 Were the oaks and the pine

 Relief from the sun I guess it can’t be fun

 All day in the burning heat

 Rain must be a treat

 A starling washes his feet

 In a nearby puddle

 A lady fights with an umbrella Getting herself into a muddle

 I wanted to shout and tell her To come and share my tree

 My dry house Where there’s no need for a key

 As these trees have history And a good memory

y Secrets they keep to themselves

 Till the day they die

 and become shelves

 Then books are placed on them

 And they live on As nature intends

For all our animal friends

 

 

 

 

Inside out and upside down

 

My sunny smile is now a frown

 

Ripped to shreds

 

Taking to my bed

 

Live in silence not a sound

 

A spinning world

 

A lonely girl

 

Veins bleed from the cut glass

 

Painful pockets form a cast

 

Around my mind

 

Light I can not find

 

I want to unwind

 

But the noose is getting tighter

 

I want to feel lighter

 

But hell weighs me to the ground

 

Crushed by life’s acid drops

 

Like a season of flooded crops

 

Poison flows

 

Dripping in through my cuts

 

Though the pain does not show

 

To be happy is a must

 

I ache to dream of summer days

 

I try but it’s all a haze

 

 

CUMMINGS

 

In the arms of an angel

 

I was lifted high

 

His kiss is like ice

 

Fresh from the sky

 

 tears turn into crystals

 

I don’t know how or why

 

Clouds formed soft cushions below

 

Like a magical marshmallow pillow

 

The sun turned the snow into fresh milk

 

And where we landed was ribbons of silk

 

We ate winter berries

 

And pink little fairies

 

Danced to my angel playing a harp

 

Stones and rocks became like chocolate drops

 

Not at all rugged and sharp

 

Frozen grass blades blew in the breaze

 

Blooms of yellows grew on the trees

 

The ice capped rivers melted so blue

 

Echoed words whispered “I love you

 

I wanted to ask my angel what was his name

 

He was so perfect like a picture in a frame

 

I looked into his eyes

 

but they were not there

 

though I just knew he had a see through stare

 

I read his face

 

He wanted to care

 

I touched his heart

 

He would always be there

 

But we had to part

 

Though only in sight

 

He taught me a lesson

 

To keep up the fight

 

He said I had to go on

 

Though my suffering would not last too long

 

As he would clear the pathway for me

 

To help me to see

 

What is the best route to go

 

Shovelling up the snow

 

Sweeping away the autumn leaves

 

Clearing the overgrown foliage from summer

 

And sleeping daffodils from spring

 

Hearing clear sounds of the church bells which ring

e of seeing within

 

Souls from the past and friends who will last

 

Knowing what to say each and every day

 

Oh I will never forget the  time we flew away

 

 

 

 

 

TEARS FOR MUM BY FIONA CUMMINGS

 

A tear falls as an ending has occurred

 

In so much pain it’s so absurd

 

Lessons we have learned

 

Words we have heard

 

Your free now

 

Like a released dove

 

Surrounded by memories of how much you were loved

 

I hurt so much inside

 

You have no idea the tears I have cried

 

A fire burns deep

 

Though the wounds I hide

 

 I have nowhere to place a flower

 

Or put a card

 

So these words are for you

 

And to write is so hard

 

But to feel is easy

 

So much I wished I had chance to say to you

 

Like I love you

 

And thank you

 

To tell you that you are beautiful

 

How I think you were wonderful

 

And because of you I went so far

 

One person who is so missed

 

I say you, are

 

I wish you had stayed

 

I pray memories never  fade

 

As you are the route to my life

 

The beat to my heart

 

My daily start

 

But my night time thought

 

Is with you I fought

 

But we could never be enemies

 

Because you were my family

 

My doting Mam

 

Because of you, is who I am

 

I wished you had never gone away

 

Where ever you are I pray

 

You have your life now

 

For you must live

 

Because when you were here

 

You only knew how to give

 

I love you Mam with all of my heart

 

Until we meet again

 

I must live through us being apart

 

 

 

No comments: