How you made me feel

How you made me feel

By Fiona Cummings

If you only knew how you made me feel

I wanted to run away

 Didn’t want this life to be real

just wanted to tell you to go away

though needed so much for you to stay

look at what you do to me

tearing at my soul

amber flames burn my coal

stones are thrown

no one to tell

nobody to phone

hurting so much deep in side

you have no idea the tears I have cried

why do you do this

it’s like the devils kiss

the fighters punch

the painful twist

the poisoned lunch

it is not my fault

 Don’t rub in the wound rough salt

I did not ask to be like this

An yet you make it my choice

Each day when reality occurs

Do you think I rejoice

I am living in hell on earth

I was a failure from birth

 Rather than giving me a wide birth

Why don’t you step in my shoes

See then who is singing the blues

Do I really want to bruise

Can’t I win don’t want to lose

In your eyes there is no gift

We can’t rise nor lift

We are sunk deep in the ground

Where you want me

Under the sea

Behind closed doors

Underneath heavy floors

I have been here so many times before

Just throw away the key and lock the door

Leave me sobbing on the floor

Out of sight

Don’t allow me to fight

Tell me what is right

Right for whom

I am like a burst balloon

Deflated and full of gloom

Sweeping life with a broken broom

You are ashamed of me

Because I can’t see

Rather than be  proud of what I have done

Not the way to treat a Mother by her one and only son