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Tuesday 22 March 2016

DIARY OF BLIND PARENTS


Good evening Bloggets. I hope wherever you are that today hasn’t been one of sadness but one of joy and hope? As the night is almost ready to turn to dawn here in the UK, I thought I would pop into our world of Bloggets and see how you all are?

 

Hub and I went to our local restaurant today. We had to pass a few challenges but got there in the end. We were met by a lovely girl at our restaurant, a waitress, with her perfect nails height and figure, I’m not too sure that this girl is only a waitress. Well, Hub planted the seed and the idea grew in my mind. I really like her so I’m hoping that this Eastern European is not what she looks like…. She is so very lovely but really looks out of place working where she does. And her boyfriend? Well, the least I say about him the better. I so hope I’m wrong as honestly I really like this girl.

 

I do listen to how she talks to mail customers though and she is rather suggestive. The Mother in me wants to talk with her but the person who just wants to eat lunch and come home is keeping out of it as her boyfriend I have been told looks a bit of a bad boy.  

 

The meal was OK. Nothing wonderful and very bad for me. I didn’t have much but I enjoyed the different scenery. Yep, I’m blind so should I perhaps say I enjoyed the different environment? Sounds and smells? Well, smells hmm. No, but sounds yes.

 

We then popped into see a lovely guy who adores our dogs and we had a nice chat. I met up with someone to do with my work and then we walked home after going to our shop for some groceries. Pasta, bags of it. Teen eats it every day of his life. Pasta and tuna.

 

I had to make a phone call to our awful Doctors. Well, receptionists. As our Doctors are great. When we get to see them that is. I have to get my blood pressure checked. Why? Not sure but I will know after next month as that is when I have to see a nurse. I have received two letters about it so I guess I should go. Now I have never had high pressure but you watch as Teen is about to go away for a few days with his friends, some girls and boys, I guess they can be classed as men and women now? Hard to think of them as that though. Anyways the day I have an appointment, is the day he is away so I bet my blood pressure is high for the first time in my life.

 

Got a text today from my lovely friend who lives just outside of London. And I must make time tomorrow to communicate with two other friends I have not heard from for a while. Also Artie, bless her I feel so bad she text me last week and each day I think I must talk with her but keep getting involved with something else.

 

Just watched a drama on BBC1 that was really pretty serious. About a boy with autism. How parents try to deny and how they like the children are treat so differently by other parents. Hub said that when his girls were little, they didn’t get invited to birthday parties. Not because they have sight problems but because he has. That is awful. He said it was heart breaking as the children felt so left out. He used to be so upset about it and realisation of how his disability affected his kids. I totally can’t stand that of others and in their perfect world with their perfect children, I hope one day they will realise what they did to make two little girls feel so left out and how it made Hub feel.

 

 I didn’t have that problem. Teen was really popular but what I found was we were invited but no one thought how we would get there? My ex was at work so much when the parties were happening so I either got a taxi or we walked.

 

Now, how did I find where we needed to be? Good question to which I don’t have an answer for. I used to follow sounds of children in our neighbourhood Mothers calling for their children. I would ask anyone I passed if they knew which direction the address was on the invitation I had in my hand. I always gave forty minutes plus to get there. Poor little lad used to tell me when there were steps and avoid barriers in the early days before I had a white cane or guide dog.

 

Gosh they were tough days I really don’t ever want back and I hope my Son will never have to face this with his children, either his kids not getting invited because they have the same eye disease as me or if God forbid he develops RP.

 

I pray with all of my heart that there will be treatment so my grandchildren won’t suffer prejudice, but that is what I thought when I was pregnant. That by the time my child was born and old enough to go to school, there would be some kind of treatment by then. Hmm. That was nineteen years ago. Mind you, we have really advanced since then.

 

But we did get to parties and home safely each time, though not sure the stress of getting my Son there was good for me? But I didn’t let him see that. I was a great actress for so many years in fact until seven years ago, all of my life till then and now I don’t need to hide anything. I say it like it is and if people don’t like it, tough.

 

We as blind parents overcompensate for our children. I didn’t have any help back then but no way I was going to make that my child’s problem. My ex and I never went out apart from I think three times in our Sons life. We didn’t have parents who could nor would baby sit. My Mum was too ill and died when my Son was one and my ex Husbands Mother, well, she was too busy with her daughters children who she used to tell me she had to look after as her daughter was incapable. And the boyfriend of her daughter, who was very nice, worked away. My ex got out a lot though so I didn’t feel bad about the fact I wouldn’t hire a baby sitter. He worked a lot as lazy was never his middle name and he had lots of sporting entertainment he did that leaving my Son and myself and we had the strongest bond because of it.

 

I hope if there is a child you know who is different or the same as your child, but their Mother or Father have either a disability or are not very conversational at the school gates, I hope you stop and think next time you are writing out invitations?

 

Well coming up to Easter and guess what? It’s forecast for rain all week. Cold tomorrow too.

 

Well I may not play hunt the Easter egg these days or pretend the Easter bunny has left the eggs, but I still will be keeping up my tradition of having Fish & Chips on Good Friday, I’m learning this is a tradition that fewer people are having these day is also a lot of Southern people don’t even know of this tradition? I was shocked to learn of this. I will be boiling eggs in onion peelings then rubbing butter on the beautiful shells to make them look like marble and for sure we will be eating Easter cakes and chocolate. I must do more of the treadmill this week to compensate.

 

Ok it’s an early start for us tomorrow. And even earlier for Teen bless him. I think he is getting sick of this job and ready to quit and I don’t blame him though he has lasted this roll for only six months he has been with the company for almost twenty months. He has been given a lot of responsibility for such a young lad and as he said tonight, his friends have only worked for a year. And that has been part time. He has worked since he was fifteen. Three jobs all long hours. I remember his first job in his school holidays; he worked 53 hours one week. I know this wasn’t legal, I did tell him this but he stuck to it for a year before moving onto another job which was part time for a year and a half. And then this job. So I think he may start to look elsewhere for a while. But I also think he may take a break for a while too. Who knows? Only he does.

 

Sleep well and take time out to think of others who are not so fortunate as yourselves? With love. X

 

 

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