I NEED A BLOODY COW

 Hello Bloggets. I’m bracing myself to go to the shop. I have fire in my stomach and it’s not a warm glow I can tell you. I really really really don’t want to go. If not for my Husband wanting a cup of tea before he leaves again, and the dotted one needing cereal, I would have black tea.

When I was given Waggatail, I was told that she was OK to “Potter around the local shops. Well, that would be fine if we didn’t need a bus to do the local shops. Waggatail will not find the bus stop to our shops. To town, where she is not allowed to go, she finds it, or I do with her help as there are loads of signs to let me know where it is, but the one to the shops? Impossible to find.

The stop to our shops, there is nothing at all. Nothing on the ground or to hear, smell or feel at the side of the road.

It’s a lamp post along a streight path.

It’s raining too. Great.

I am shaking inside. Oh God I so hate myself. I really need some of my friend’s confidence. My blind friends are just so amazing and I know they will graciously say it’s because they have been blind all their lives, and that is so kind of them to make excuses as there is nothing worse, than a blind person telling another that it’s easy.

If only I was given a good guide dog from stage one. Eleven years ago, I was given my so called by GD’s, borderline reject. I mean, someone who is not confident, would you?

If only I had LC. I know I would be so much better.

It’s the knowledge that I really don’t know A, if I will get there and B, if I will get back, with at least my dignity in place.

Bloody milk. I need a cow.

I shall have to go now or I won’t at all. So gulp and a deep sigh. Off I go. X