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Tuesday 31 March 2015

TOP TIPS TODAY AND THE SEXY VISITOR


Well, I asked my Son if he could go to the Post office to post some letters that needed weighing, but when I saw the weather, I couldn’t do that to him. So I asked him to just pop it in the box on his way to work. I wrote out the address and was proud to know that my teen could read it. He read it aloud. So I knew it was right. I wrote inside the card I sent too and I didn’t ask for him to read that, but hoped the pen had warmed up by then and I haven’t sent my Sister in Law a blank card? I write at the very top of the cards and bottom. As hopefully that is the only place there is no official writing. It’s getting more difficult now to write birthday/Christmas cards. One when I was younger, you knew where the picture on the card was as  when you closed it, the picture side was always narrower than the writing side, and the writing was on only one side of the card. Now it’s all the same size and there is writing everywhere on the card, both sides. But if you write at the very top and bottom, normally there is no writing.

 

I’m so pleased that I still can write and it can be understood. Its one bit of independence I have left. Now when it comes to sticking our queen’s head on the envelope? I am sure most times she is standing on her head. You know its little things like that which could easily be improved. Like a tiny rough part of the stamp at the top left corner? Or a rounded edge on the top left.  Same as notes, money. So much could be done to make it easier. Telling what notes I have is a challenge. My Husband is quite good at it, but I never trust him. As how can you be so sure?  I find out from the bank or a sighted person I can trust like my Son, what denomination I have, and then fold it in different ways.

 

So the £5 folds into a square. The ten rolled into kind of a pen shape and the twenty in half.

 

As for coins, our coins are quite easy to know, having said that, I truly can’t remember the last time I got any? Everything is a note now and no change.

 

Putting washing in the machine, I have bought a washer that clicks when finding programs. There is a mark on the dial so I put it at 12 o clock knowing that is off. And try to remember how many clicks for whatever program I need. It’s really not an easy life all this additional rubbish that gives us the independence we share.

 

Our heads are full of maps. Remembering how to just get about. Those with sight really don’t realise how stress free their lives are.

 

My Son told me today that the new rug I bought you can’t see or make out the cream, for black dog hairs. Oh great. I have hoovered that every day if not twice. But he said they are not getting picked up. So I guess I am going to have to bring the Sebo vacuum from upstairs. We use that for the carpets. Down we have hard floors and use a Henry. Henry is great for wood but Sebo for carpets. We can’t get a vacuum that does both. We have been through every make. Really, I look at a vacuum and it breaks. Nothing is Fifi proof.

 

 Oh I must tell you about the visitors I had before. The doorbell rang. I opened it I’m sure looking like a frightened kitten. I hate answering the door if I don’t know who is there or I’m not expecting anything or anyone.

 

Guess who it or they were?

 

Blooming Mormons.

Oh they are such lovely people. So very polite, but I watched a documentary on them last year and really didn’t like the process of their inscription into their religion. It was so sad. Kind of brainwash. I didn’t like that at all. It’s a shame really, as they are lovely people. I tell you, the Canadian guy, ooooooo’oooo’ooo

Rather dishy.

I mean his voice, he for all I know, could have had a face like a smacked bottom, or chewed up toffee.

 

But his voice, oh, was to die for. Gosh, he was sexy. Hahaha. Good job my Hub doesn’t read my blogs right? Well, I will teach him for betraying the Bloggets.

 

Anyway, my Son was horrified as I began to tell them what I believe in. I don’t care. I also told them they were very nice young men. It was lovely to hear such manners. Oh heck. I sound so old these days?

 

Teen had me laughing; he said or asked what would happen when they went next door? Our lovely neighbours are Muslims. I told him they would tell them they are Muslims and the lads would be on their way knowing they can’t convert. Oh but he took it a stage further and I’m not sure I can write what he said but it was so funny, he was pretending to be gay and I must say, he does the gay thing rather well. One of his best friends is gay and really doesn’t talk at all like teens impression of gay people but we do have a friend who is the double of Teens impression. I will write one phrase he said.

“Oh, luv, come on in? Twenty minutes with me and I will have you shouting Jesus.

 

Heck, I hope I haven’t lost half of my Bloggets now with this comment. Let’s move on. I guess you had to be there. As teen does this funny walk and what makes it more humorous, he puts my hands on him to show me his moves. It was nice to see a little of the old fun teen back. Having said that, he also has been like a bear with a sore head since yesterday.  If I say black he says white.

 

Did I tell you last night he told me he likes a certain name for a boy? Oh I felt sick. Hub thinks he was winding me up. And it worked. Oh but the name he likes? It’s dreadful. Really dreadful. I’m not going to lose more Bloggets by telling you as it may be your name. Hahahhaa.

 

I don’t care what he calls his baby. I do care what he calls his wife.

 

He has gone to work now. So I have an hour to myself before I have to cook dinner and do the floors again for the second time. It’s rather late and I don’t have a clue what to cook for dinner tonight.

 

I’m so not hungry. I may just have salad. But will have to cook a proper meal for the boys.

 

Teen coming in after eight. Hub just before six. Oh he has a really odd taxi driver today. Really, Hub is repulsed by him. Honestly, I may write a blog on Hubs taxi drivers sometime this week as there are some really funny stories and characters, or should that be, car actors?

 

We have some letters to try to read tonight. Sometimes I would love to be able to afford a P.a. Oh that would be great. To go shopping with and to walk the dog when I wanted and to read things for us. To scan it takes so long. As I have talked about before. Put it in the scanner, wait until it uploads then find out it’s the wrong way around then turn it, to find it’s an advertising letter. Most of those are different paper, shiny, but some are not.

 

I would say almost half of our letters per week are adverts. A quarter is charity bags though so we have somewhere to put the adverts in to recycle.

 

OK will go for now, I hope this blog has helped you some way, if not I hope the next one will? Oh, one last tip before I go. When making tea with milk, put the milk in first as if you put water in first, it’s more difficult to judge the top of the cup so you when pouring milk in will go over the top. I tell you, when I take no notice of myself, my kitchen tops are the cleanest in the world as they are wiped the most…..

A smile until later.

A panda walks into a cafe. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons. "Why?" asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage. The panda pauses on his way out, produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual, and tosses it over his shoulder. "Well, I'm a panda," he says at the door. "Look it up." The waiter turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation: "Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."

 


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