I CAN'T TELL YOU BY FIONA CUMMINGS

I CAN’T TELL YOU

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

 

The brisk northern wind in my hair

Silver diamond tears as I stare

Ice leaves me without motion

Saying goodbye to devotion

As I look to the ocean

From this cliff as my potion

I’m ready to fall

As I hear voices call

Pure white gulls fly

Through the watery sky

I ask myself why?

How did it all come to this?

My lips without a kiss

My arms empty

I want peace and to feel bliss

To have all I miss

As howling air sings to me

My eyes blurred so I can’t see

Is this really my destiny?

Is this what the Lord planned for me?

I’m dizzy now

  I ask how

How do I do this jump to end the pain?

Heavenly tears rain

Icicles hang on rocks 

Am I insane?

Sand on my face cuts

As I feel the urge to leave go

Hands trembling

 Body descending

Future depending

No time to go back now

Lines of terror, on my brow

Life before me

Once again I see

Then I’m in total shock

As my head hits the rock

But my spirit soul rises

What happened next?

Full of surprises

For this I can’t talk about

Though so badly I want to shout

As if only you all knew

Your hopes were so true

But if I tell

I will be sent to hell

I had a close escape from there

But thankfully my angel did care

And forgave me

For she knew of my pain

And fought for a second chance

So I can again

Laugh sing and dance

But my words I can’t tell

The fragrants I can smell

Water fresh from a well

Only tears of joy

Soldiers don’t deploy

Only peace is hear

We know of no fear

But I can’t tell you how or why

Just if you believe look to the sky

For here there is a land

Where you will never be alone

Or without a helping hand

But I can sadly not show you where it is yet

Though if you wait you will learn I bet

If you don’t believe

Then your time may come

But meanwhile have fun

And enjoy your world

For I can’t give you my map to my path of gold

My fortune has been sold

And I need nothing materialistic

For this world is magic

But it’s not your time

Just wait in the line

I had to come hear

For my heart was unclear

My veins burst

And I wanted no Hurst

I had to be first

Before you all

So when you need me

Just call

Fly don’t fall

I was weak

No words to speak

No pun intended

No tongue and cheek

My soul climbed high

Though my body sunk

I felt drunk

With life’s fluid

I was truant

To life as I knew it

Though I can’t tell you where you will go

I can assure you when it’s time you will know

Goodbye from the sky

Don’t ask why

For I can’t tell you

But I also can’t lie

Look to the stars at night

And know my plight

I gave up the fight

But you know what’s right

My wings are ready

My cloak material there’s plenty

I will guide you to live your life you were given

Until it’s time for heaven

Don’t knock on this door

For you have been here before

And will not be welcome until your name is called

You are on your land so small

To find who gave you your call

As you have a place there

Open your heart and share

Admire the beauty

And respond to your duty

Seas so bitter

Gulls of litter

Salt so brash

Rocks that smash

Waters so deadly

Motions a medley

Pictures so real

Thoughts surreal

Forbidden fruit I peal

No emotion I feel

No words are spoken

About the word heaven

As we are not allowed to say

Until you have your day

 

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015