A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

I have been asked to write some words of advice on what makes a healthy relationship. My word, where to begin? I guess at the beginning would be a good start right?

 

 Think of a relationship as a plant. So the ingredients for your plant start with a pot of healthy soil mixture yes? Mind you, I’m a one for talking about healthy plants, as I kill them just thinking about getting out the watering can.

 

So I suppose what I’m saying is there has to be an initial attraction from the start. You have to have those seeds. Then your plant will grow but only if it’s treat well.

 

It’s easy to get into bad habits. Routine and if this is happening in your relationship, break it now.

 

Spontaneous actions. Surprise your partner. It doesn’t have to be too elaborate something simple like running them a hot bath after work sprinkling some petals from the garden or having a candle with beautiful fragrance coming from it, whilst it burns as your loved one relaxes. Or cooking their favourite meal. Put the kids to bed set the table as though you are having guests play some nice music and enjoy. Or just buy some flowers on your way home from work and of cores don’t just throw them down and go to shower for her to find them herself, hand them to her with a kiss.

 

Breakfast in bed if that is their preference, how hard is that? But the most important thing is to listen and communicate. Then there is compromise. It’s healthy not to agree all of the time, so if you can come to a mutual decision then better you both will be, using

Words of affirmation. So once you set ground rules down stick to them moreover, respect your partner’s ways.

 

Appreciation is so important. It’s easy to forget to thank your loved one and take for granted. I mean, they know you are grateful, right? Yep, they may, but still how long will it take you to reassure and in such few words? “Thank you”  “I truly appreciate what you do!” “You’re so kind” “wow.

 See, you don’t even have to use many words.

 

Of course it’s not all plain sailing. There comes a time when you may admonish with words. How you then handle that situation is also a vital tool in your relationship. Remember compromise.

 

When you let down your partner with lies dishonesty perhaps cheating, where to go next?

 

Gosh, that’s a tough one. You can build on a relationship and last your entire life together, but sadly the roots of your plant are damaged. Rotten. So no more flowers or fruits will grow. Your plant may live, but not healthy. So do all you can to avoid a dishonest life?

 

Remember when you meet your handsome prince or beautiful Princess; they won’t stay like that forever, so it has to be about what’s inside of the person to. Do they make you laugh? Feel safe? Do you get butterflies waiting to see them? Would you love them if they went grey bald or had to have their beautiful pearly whites removed? If they need glasses or a walking frame? It’s all lovely when you are fresh young things, but for an everlasting relationship, you both will change and not only in appearance, but your thoughts and even beliefs will change as you grow. Talking of growing, your slim loved one or toned young man will end up perhaps the oddest shape you can imagine. Yes, you can say that won’t be us, we care too much about our health and bodies but guess what? Millions have said that before you.

 

So this is a brief synopsis on a paper I’m writing. I really don’t know why I was asked to write this as what do I know different to you? But sometimes we need our minds brought up to date as we can be forgetful and enjoy the comfortable slippers next to the hearth.

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015