YES WE DID FLY BY FIONA CUMMINGS (WORDS FROM AN ANGEL)

YES WE DID FLY

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

 

Take my hand and I will show you the way

Hear my words and I will teach you what to say

Open your heart

And make a new start

I will pull you from that hole

And touch your soul

Keep you warm in winters

With logs and coal

Hear my song to you

Whenever you feel blue

Repeat these words

Because I, love you

When in stress

Find a quiet zone

Know I’m hear

You are never alone

Look at my arms open wide

See into my mind

I have nothing to hide

Jump onto my wings and take a ride

Through clouds of sunny days and a cobalt night

Don’t be worried

Hold on tight

Fly with me through silver stars

And through rainbows so bright

Don’t forget to make a wish

Isn’t it bliss?

You can see the world with me

Feel free

The air in our face

Life without a trace

This is magical

A miracle

Look all around

Down on the ground

I’m so happy

You my friend I have found

I was asked to look for you

I didn’t know what to do

As you are my first

This is real

Not a play that can be rehearsed

I hope you will start to believe

There is a reason we have to grieve

To get to this stage in life

To start living

Giving

And learning to see what is beyond

Across the rippling pond

And over the bridge on the stream

You can find your dream

Next to the cherry tree

Open your eyes and see

 Listen to the birds sing

There’s room on my other wing

For you to bring a friend

I’m as real as you

I don’t pretend

You are not imagining this

Look through your mist

See a clear vision

Take your position

And find your direction

Experience my affection

And remove all anger

Forget bad words of slander

And hatred

For I will feed you with positivity

Because you were sent to me

And I was given to you

To show you a new view

On life’s reasons

Through our makers presence

Now then, can you see?

Just what you mean to me?

You are so important

Your life isn’t spent

There is a message

In this sentiment

So time to go back to the world you know

Through pastures green and sun so yellow

Now you know your destiny

Make the best of what is meant to be

Don’t worry

I will be back

This is a memory

To remove the black

Feel the spirit who loves you

Hear the words so true

For you are special to me

And I know now why I was sent to you

Through blankets so inky blue

To find the strength to get to you

To lift you from the pit of doom

To fly so high

Like a beautiful balloon

Be brave and know why

And yes

We did fly

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

JUST A FEELING BY FIONA CUMMINGS

JUST A FEELING

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

I’ve never met you

An yet I feel I know you

Your words so clever

As though you have lived forever

Do you know what an inspiration you are?

Look at you

You’ve come so far

Achieved so much

Powerful but with a gentle approach

You focus

You know what you want

Like a crocus

Comes back with a fight

A goal, that item you hunt

Facing the light

No matter what tries to smother you

 Forcing through the ice

You don’t cut

You slice

With you there’s no but

Just if it’s right

You are so strong and I believe in you

Though your face to me

Is one without a view?

Your voice you see

Has no sound

Your feet are firmly on the ground

How do I know this?

For I have never met you

Let me tell you this

I don’t need to

It’s a feeling I have deep down inside

I feel the tears you have cried

But you tell no one

So how can we help you?

It’s healthy to let down your guard from time to time

 All I can say is I’m here for you

And thank you for being a friend of mine

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

DIARY THE BIG TEN?

Have you ever wondered where you will be in ten years from now?

I have and it kind of excites me as well as terrifies me.

 

I know where I would like to be. Shall I tell you?

 

Well, for sure slimmer, though that would take a miracle. I would love to be writing to tell you all about the day I was at my Son’s wedding. Again, as I sit here now, another miracle will have to have occurred.

To tell you about my first Grandchild. How proud I am, and again, guess what?

Yep, you are getting the miracle thing now, right?

 

I would love to tell you that I have had many books published. Now that’s not too much of a miracle, I hope? Though some readers may think so.

 

Then the next Biggy. I bet you have guessed this one? The blind can see and the deaf can hear. Wow, again Bloggets, I don’t think a miracle I think it will happen in time. Only yesterday I was reading about the bionic hand and how the good old people in my home town of Newcastle are working on finger tips. So they can sense. They are quite advanced in stem cell for our eyes too.

 

So realistically?

Well, I hope my great Nieces and Nephews have established a bond with me as I have already with them. My brother will be in his early sixties. Let me tell you Bloggets, there’s a huu’uuge age gap between us. Hehehe. He will still be working as he is a work a holic. My Sister in law will be retired, though she’s not the kind to sit about so not sure what she will do with her days, unless she and I could be ladies who do lunch.

And dinner

And Supper, oh and if we are quick, breakfast? Because of course by then food will be so genetically modified, it will be calorie free.

 

My Hubs brothers are a few years younger than us so they will still be working. I hope not as much as they are doing now, as really, they work so many hours. Sadly not sure Father in Law will be around, hope so, but he will be in his late eighties, and a lot of my friends will have died as they are a load older than me. That will be awful. I do have a lot of friends my age and a few younger, one coming on Saturday. She’s only twenty two, so she may be married by then with children?

Magda, arrives tomorrow and I have done no housework for her arrival. I guess this means I’m more chilled these days right? Hahahaha.  Nope, just lazy. Having said that, I have done loads of washing this week and the normal dusting and cleaning floors, that’s all I do with two dogs. Also writing. I’m meeting someone today who wants so much written for them. I have already started on that but will have more to do for them.

 

So back to the ten year thing.

Will I still live here? I hope so I do feel at home now, though it took me two years to do so.

 

Our daughters may be married with children, oh that would be lovely. As long as their partners were good of course?

 

Driverless cars will be on our roads. Scary. And more and more people on our earth unless we have managed to kill many off by then.

 

There will be more treatments for cancer I bet and more diseases we have not encountered yet.

 

What would be amazing is we have all got some kind of shock that will kick us into submission. To realise we have to all live in peace. Then what a world we will have?

 

What will our houses be like? Hmm. A bit like the ones we have now, I think fast forward fifty years, electrics will be all different. There will be no wires.

Things like TV’s in ten years? Well, if you think about it, they haven’t changed too much but I bet we will have smelly telly by then. So if something is getting cooked we will smell it. Hehehe. Could have advantages? There again, if there is an agricultural program on, em, and the fields are getting spread with something undesirable?

 

In ten years, I think we will talk to our electrics. Washing machine for example, telling it to wash whites. It would be brilliant for us if the washer then says “Fiona, take out the red T/shirt? “  Or on the side of the washing machine it had an accurate colour detector. Kitchen gadgets are becoming more and more challenging for us who can’t see. Everything is on screen or touch screen.  How kind those designers who are reading this if you would take into consideration the blind in the kitchen please? Because guess what, we can cook. Honestly. All this about getting our MP’s to do a blind walk around the towns is great, but how about getting them to experience our kitchens?

 

Though Hub was tired when he got back from his overnight stay and late getting in, he still went on the treadmill and exercise bike in the cold garage at ten at night. Now that is dedication. Where can I get this from please?

 

He eats so little an yet puts weight on so quickly. But he has lost some from Christmas, only trouble is I have found it for him.

 

I’m getting excited now for teen’s birthday. Nothing at all planned, he had his boy’s day out last week for it and bless him, he’s working on the actual day, but I have managed to get him a couple of sweet surprises. Nothing major. He didn’t want jewellery that is what we normally buy for 18^th and 21^st birthdays, though he loves jewels.  or a tankard, and he didn’t want that, all he asks for is money for his car, hehehe. Well, he has had that twice over and spent it, so there’s no more left. The money tree has uprooted.

Anyway, he has to pass his test first. That is Monday. Oh heck, I’m scared for that. I want him to pass but don’t want him to drive just yet; I don’t think he’s had enough practice.

 

I love birthdays for other people, don’t like my own, but love my families birthday. We also have our oldest daughters eighteenth this year too.

 

Dinner tonight? Oh heck, I don’t know, but will cook something. Last night I made a huge pan of spaghetti and a oven full of meatballs with the best sauce full of cherry tomatoes.

And of course cheese for the spaghetti. Then Hub text me from the train to tell me he had something to eat on the train as he was starving as had no breakfast or lunch and couldn’t wait.  Ok, looking at all of the food.

Hmm.

Teen’s lunch. Yep, Goodness knows what it will be like cold, but teen has had cold spaghetti before with tuna and peppers. So we will see what he thinks tonight when he gets in.

 

If he eats all of that, he will be full.

 

He hasn’t been to the gym for ages. Just totally gone off it. I guess its winter and so cold getting there is a pain.

 

Okay. Must dash as my oven is beeping in that kind of guide dog whistle sound. I’m sure driving our dogs mad. As the kitchen door is closed so they can’t get to the whistle. Haha. Bless them. Why the alarm is off, not sure. Easily fixed though.

 

Take care Bloggets. Xx

DIARY OF FRUSTRATION

Well, I have a gift voucher from my friend and I can’t spend it. I also for the same shop have a £5 voucher and today was sent a code for 15% off. So in total I have £40 plus fifteen per cent off and I can’t use the dam things because the shop online is not excepting my password and I know it is the right one but anyway when I press the button to say reset password, I get asked to put in my email, you know, the email they have been writing to telling me I have money off left right and centre? The email that sends me messages every other day. So I try to re-register and they say I can’t guess why?

Because I am already registered at that email address. Okay, I’m now frustrated.

 

I did loads of writing yesterday and today but don’t feel like doing housework though have to. So a short blog to see how you all are.

 

I’m in my conservatory it’s kind of a wish washy day of sun and rain.

 The roads out my back yard are so noisy with tires sounding as though they are being washed in puddles.

 

But the birds still sing. Talking of birds, I read such an interesting article about four this morning. As you do, about a little girl in America who feeds the crows and they bring her gifts. She has a box full of shiny objects that the birds have brought her. They leave them on the place she leaves food.

The girl’s Mother even lost her hub cap from her wheel on her car and the crows brought it back. When the camera was checked out, it showed the bird with the cap washing it in the water the family provide.

 

Then it took the cap to the bird table. And left it there.

 

How wonderful are they? I never liked crows until today.

 

Teen was great company yesterday when Hub was away, hehehe, he left the house at eight in the morning for college, came home for twenty minutes and left to be with his friend to go fishing. Of course that was a quick session as he then went to be with it and obviously couldn’t have a long session with his pal, as that would mean he would be having too much fun. So instead, he sat in a house with it and got in after walking and bussing home in the cold taken over an hour at ten in the evening he was shattered. I told him to go to bed.

 

Funny isn’t it around pay day, he is with it a lot? I guess that’s true love, right?

 

He had a lovely day and who wouldn’t with the most beautiful lady God ever made, right? I mean, she is a stunner. Teen tells me.

 

In fairness so do others, though those who know her say much more too.

 

But this is my future daughter in law, not that I will ever see her as we won’t even be going to my Son’s wedding. I wouldn’t be able to keep my mouth shut.

 

Talking to my friend via phone yesterday and she told me her daughter took the dog to the vet as her ear, the dogs that is, not the daughters, was enormous. They took the dog away, drained it and after only ten minutes, charged, wait for it?

£170

That is shocking. No operation, just a needle.

 

Then the best bit’s swollen again.

 

Okay, vets are rip offs. As are dentists.

 

So washing with my name on it I must go for now, and talk later. Xxx

A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

I have been asked to write some words of advice on what makes a healthy relationship. My word, where to begin? I guess at the beginning would be a good start right?

 

 Think of a relationship as a plant. So the ingredients for your plant start with a pot of healthy soil mixture yes? Mind you, I’m a one for talking about healthy plants, as I kill them just thinking about getting out the watering can.

 

So I suppose what I’m saying is there has to be an initial attraction from the start. You have to have those seeds. Then your plant will grow but only if it’s treat well.

 

It’s easy to get into bad habits. Routine and if this is happening in your relationship, break it now.

 

Spontaneous actions. Surprise your partner. It doesn’t have to be too elaborate something simple like running them a hot bath after work sprinkling some petals from the garden or having a candle with beautiful fragrance coming from it, whilst it burns as your loved one relaxes. Or cooking their favourite meal. Put the kids to bed set the table as though you are having guests play some nice music and enjoy. Or just buy some flowers on your way home from work and of cores don’t just throw them down and go to shower for her to find them herself, hand them to her with a kiss.

 

Breakfast in bed if that is their preference, how hard is that? But the most important thing is to listen and communicate. Then there is compromise. It’s healthy not to agree all of the time, so if you can come to a mutual decision then better you both will be, using

Words of affirmation. So once you set ground rules down stick to them moreover, respect your partner’s ways.

 

Appreciation is so important. It’s easy to forget to thank your loved one and take for granted. I mean, they know you are grateful, right? Yep, they may, but still how long will it take you to reassure and in such few words? “Thank you”  “I truly appreciate what you do!” “You’re so kind” “wow.

 See, you don’t even have to use many words.

 

Of course it’s not all plain sailing. There comes a time when you may admonish with words. How you then handle that situation is also a vital tool in your relationship. Remember compromise.

 

When you let down your partner with lies dishonesty perhaps cheating, where to go next?

 

Gosh, that’s a tough one. You can build on a relationship and last your entire life together, but sadly the roots of your plant are damaged. Rotten. So no more flowers or fruits will grow. Your plant may live, but not healthy. So do all you can to avoid a dishonest life?

 

Remember when you meet your handsome prince or beautiful Princess; they won’t stay like that forever, so it has to be about what’s inside of the person to. Do they make you laugh? Feel safe? Do you get butterflies waiting to see them? Would you love them if they went grey bald or had to have their beautiful pearly whites removed? If they need glasses or a walking frame? It’s all lovely when you are fresh young things, but for an everlasting relationship, you both will change and not only in appearance, but your thoughts and even beliefs will change as you grow. Talking of growing, your slim loved one or toned young man will end up perhaps the oddest shape you can imagine. Yes, you can say that won’t be us, we care too much about our health and bodies but guess what? Millions have said that before you.

 

So this is a brief synopsis on a paper I’m writing. I really don’t know why I was asked to write this as what do I know different to you? But sometimes we need our minds brought up to date as we can be forgetful and enjoy the comfortable slippers next to the hearth.

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

A DREAM BY FIONA CUMMINGS

A DREAM

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

 

No time for snoring

Adults are boring

They just don’t understand

When I tell them about ted and friends

From another land

My toys come alive at night

As soon as Mum turns off the light

Rag doll Sam

With her floppy flowery hat

Bertie bear and his big band

And Noodles the cat

He climbs onto my pillow

 Purrs so gentle and mellow

Dancing Dugi dog

Jumps like a frog

My brother Jacobs soldiers I must mention

Stand to attention

Until lights are off

Then let the battle commence

Higgody hobby horse

Jumps over the fence

 As for my dolls house?

During the day as quiet as a mouse

When my parents are sleeping

In the house mini people are creeping

Through the little windows

Lights turn on and off

But nothing can be heard

No squeaking or a cough

Peeping through the letterbox

I see Mr. Fox

How did he get in there

With Bertie bear

Oh this is so much fun

Scared? Me want to run?

You must be joking

This is amazing

I mean look at the chimney smoking?

I want to get in that house

With its picket fence outside

A small bike for a ride

Lego trees

And in the kitchen on the little table

Is the pretend holy cheese

Look at my dolly Mable

She’s brushing her hair

And brothers marbles

Are rolling everywhere

This is magical

My wooden box is musical

As the ballerina twirls

I smile at tiny tears

She’s beautiful with popcorn curls

A world without fears

There is no harm to be had here

My rocking chair moves back and forward

As the key turns on the door of the cupboard

Out come fuzzy felt bees

And flying geese

The circus has come to town

With Clarence the clown

And his knobbly knees

The chimps with their tricks

And men on high sticks

Look at Barbie on the tightrope

The big tent

Full of colour

Plastic coins spent

At my toy shop

With sugared mice

And a lollypop

Jars of candy

Served by Millie molly Mandy

A skipping rope

Bubbles of soap

Jelly tot necklace

And cola cube rings

Little dresses made from lace

For Phoebe and Beth

As they are twins

Well I got them both for my birthday

From best friend Fey

And cousin Maisieann

With a Japanese porcelain doll

Holding a fan

Oh look at the foam bullets

Shooting at the can

Big brother Elliot

Will go mad

Off flies the helicopter

 Without a pilot

 Hey this is cool

I don’t want to sleep to wake for school

Let me stay at home

And answer the phone

Who will call tonight?

Peter Rabbit might?

As he talks, you know

But only when, the adults go

Jack n a box

Needs winding up

Lid pops

And he jumps up

The snakes climb the ladder

The dice make a clatter

The king of diamonds

Walks to Simple Simon

Who met with the pie man?

Who sheered the sheep

With little Bo Peep

Whilst the dish ran away with the spoon

And from my window the cow jumped over the moon

Oh this is fun

And look at the sun

It’s got its hat on

It’s coming out to play

In this world it’s never night or day

I wish it would last forever

With a chocolate fountain

And a Milky Way river

I’m no judge

With my bag of fudge

But standing next to the fort

I have a thought

If only adults believed

This is not a dream

Full of blankets of marshmallows

And bubble gum pillows

With sherbet socks

And lemon drops

This is my bedroom

With a honey cone balloon

And a coconut mushroom

With a pixie playing a tune

Mummy thinks I’m a good girl

As I come to bed each night

Without an argument

Or even a fight

Who can blame me?

For enjoying my mystery

 Of a giant peach

And it’s all in reach

Next thing I know

I’ve fallen a sleep

    And the house has gone silent

And thoughts are deep

When I awake

Will I remember what amusement I’ve seen

Shall I tell myself it’s all been a dream?

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

A BRIEF EPIPHANY BY FIONA CUMMINGS

A BRIEF EPIPHANY

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

 

As the new born lambs did frolic

In pastures bucolic

Hills of green did conflate

As storms no longer could wait

As I unfolded my umbrella

Creating a penumbra

There was something positively delicious

About my meeting it was surreptitious

Those close to me were suspicious

So I had to be careful

Damp due among a nettle

And a spring daffodil

Near a forgotten fence

Waiting for romance

Some would say dalliance

 Taking a chance

Among beauty so efflorescence

Suddenly it came to me

A brief epiphany

I did gambol

Among heather and wild bramble

Grasses so lissom

I could only listen

As the full river did Glisson

Bird’s melody so mellifluous

My excitement was ridiculous

Thoughts so sempiternal

I had to decide

Feelings I couldn’t hide

 Time now for an elixir

Thoughts so panacea

As the watery sun fell from the sky

And songster wings again did fly

A different temperature

Mother earth gave off such petrichor

The air filled with dulcet dreams

Branches bowed to me on their knees

As though to be evocative

For they knew I was in love

This secret had to have a closure

So as I waited, at the cynosure

My handsome prince did come

Twas there on bended knee

He proposed to me

Now secrets have all gone

And true we both can be

For together we sing our harmony

And create our family

Nature knew

Bells so blue

Daffodils yellow

Weeping willow

Life so mellow

Strings from a cello

Earth below

 And heaven so high

No more questions how or why

Till angels call us and we die

We live as one

In love, as our hearts fly

 

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

LET IT DIE BY FIONA CUMMINGS

LET IT DIE

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

Its eating away

Day by day

Holds on in a harness

Like a furnace

Burning

Churning

I can   feel it gnawing at my insides

I can’t get to it, as it hides

Started as a flame

Oh the pain

As it grew inside of me

Something no one can see

Is it the devils work?

Driving me berserk

Will it fill my body?

Then what will happen

When the flame overflows

No answers no one knows

Feeling so grotty

Frozen to the chair

Like a mad man

With a vacant stair

My stomach is in agony

Been cut now a tare

Poison I can’t remove

But I know it’s there

Afraid of my shadow

This flame does glow

But won’t show

It’s a secret

We are not meant to know

So how to kill it

This beast without whit

To end the suffering

The violence of a hit

Why do I have it?

Who gave it to me?

Its pure evil

That we cannot see

Is it grief?

Is it fear of the unknown?

Has my soul been visited by a thief

Whose cowardly face remains unknown?

Can I treat it with a pill?

To end its life

Make a hole with a drill

Cut with a knife

Let it escape

How to do this I cry

It’s comfortable inside of me, why?

End its life please let it die

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

SEEING DOUBLE?

I can’t believe it, I published this blog and when I looked, it was the blog number of the year I was born. Gosh, is this a message? There are some who believe so. Others would say it’s quinky dinky.

 

I would love to go and visit a fortune teller. One that was renowned to be good. I have seen so many in my past, two of them were amazing. Loads were rubbish. I saw one in America even with my dear friend Yam. She did say a few things that came true.

 

My Husband dislikes the idea of me visiting a spooky cookie. I guess it is messing with what we don’t quite understand and what if they were to tell me something I didn’t want to hear? But then they could tell me something I so badly wanted to know and I could chill about what I am really worried about. You know when they are fake and when they are the real deal.

 

My peace is about to be interrupted as teen is on his way home from first day at college after half term.

 

So loud music I guess. At least he won’t have pans all over my kitchen as he phoned to tell me he has had lunch out.

 

It’s a very sunny day and mild. We are going through odd weather.

 

My dog is playing with her toy. A ball that sings. Hehehe. And goes

“Neher, neh, neh. Neh neh. Neh’h’h

 

Oh yes, only the best toys for our beasty girls. Ahahah.

 

Already counting the hours until Hub is home. About another thirty four.

 

You know he is at a meeting that really is in my opinion pointless. Patronising too as they will be drawing pictures and playing stupid games that obviously can’t involve a blind person. Suppose to be team building. Really, let him and others get on with their job of helping people.

 

Right, off to write some poetry now. I feel bluebells coming on. I just love to write. Really I do. And for some odd reason, you read what I write. This bit I don’t get But I’m so grateful you enjoy the rubbish I write. As one day you I pray will all read my autobiography and that will be a show shocker.

Below is the blog number of the year I was born. So this is a message to my RP friends, now what message? I’m not sure. But someone out there may be able to tell? It’s about getting treatment for our condition. If you have read it already, thank you. If you are reading it for the first time, thank you. If you are one of those scientists or researchers please keep going and if you are donating to fighting RP or fighting  blindness, thank you all to from the bottom of our hearts.

Before I go, here’s some final words before my repeated blog.

The right people will come into your life but you have to let the wrong people walk away too.

Start believing today that your best days are in front of you. How wonderful your future will be.

When you face adversity, you need to remind yourself whatever is trying to defeat could very well be what God will use to promote you. You can change your life by changing your words. Death and life are in your tongue.

 

 

 

India, Spain, America, Germany, United Kingdom, Belgium, Portugal, Kenya, Netherlands and Canada are just some of my Bloggets who are reading today. How are you all? Well I left you early last night; early for us is ten in the evening. To go to bed as my Husband had to be up at 5a.m to catch a 6.a.m train, so to give him a chance to sleep. Well, he can sleep on a clothes line. Really, he makes me laugh. He will get into bed and say. “Oh, I doubt I will be able to sleep tonight.” 

Yeah, right, about three minutes later, the walls are rattling.

 

Me? Em, nope. I’m lying there forcing myself to close my eyes. Thoughts buzzing through my head, drilling into my skull like a workmen’s tool. I then put on my IPod, with earphones of course. After an hour I feel tired. I turn it off and about an hour later, I’m putting it back on after having no sleep at all. Well, fast forward some hours. Last night or this morning, it was half three before I remember feeling as though I was drifting off. That was after getting up and eating two apples. Haha haha. Yep, your Fifi Blogget is a strange one.

 

The alarm went off at five and poor Hub got up and ready, thankfully last night he put his bag together. He’s amazing he remembers everything. My ex had to be reminded about everything and I can tell I get on Hubs nerves when I do a check list with him.

 

 Well, as ever the taxi was late. But he got there on time.  He had to make a change too. I hate it when he does that. Just more for me to worry about. But again thankfully he managed and the last time I spoke to him by phone he was in a railway café with a coffee and a breakfast snack. As it’s a long day for him and his meeting wasn’t until ten so he would be an hour early, but the trains were fully booked as he found out yesterday for a later time.

 

He has taken his faithful Long Chops with him. She will be happy she is working. He has left her at home the past two days as she wasn’t too well at the weekend….

 

Oh but we had shirt gate before he left. I got him a shirt last night from the robe and he put it on today and he didn’t recognise it… Heck, I hope it’s not one of the girls? Hehehe Pyjama top? Oh my word. We just wouldn’t know, I must say when he wore it, I also didn’t recognise it. Our girls are tiny slim so I doubt it is theirs, but you never know? That is the the number one thing that really gets to me. Clothes. Sorting them out. I really can’t deal with it. I’m getting worse too. I think it’s because we have too many. It’s not too bad for me as I remember my clothes but for Hub? As especially because my friend Vivi buys him shirts. Mind you, they are almost always blue.

 

I was thinking last night whilst the workmen were doing their job inside my brain. Imagining if I was to get sight because of a fantastic breakthrough in some years to come?  The moment when bandages would be removed from my eyes. Gosh, would I be too afraid to look? What if the operation hadn’t worked? How would my emotions cope? I guess I would be alright. As I would be no different to now. Yes of course disappointed, but grateful that the medics were trying to do something. So I was stage one, Okay, bring on stage two…

 

So this time it worked. My eyes would open to a brand new world. Wow, I would see the face of the man who performed this life changing achievement. I would search the room for my Husband seeing on the way to him items in the room I have never been able to see, even when I was partially sighted. I probably wouldn’t recognise what the tools were. Then my Husband. Oh wow, what would he look like? As I’ve said before, last time I saw him he was twelve. We both were. Oh the thought of seeing him now? As for my Son? He was one when I saw him last. In five days, he will be eighteen. A man. How would my heart deal with such shocks? Gosh, the thought of all of that and that is before I got to a mirror? Looking at myself may finish me off. Hehehe. When I could see, I could never see my whole face in the mirror. Only parts of it. Like for example, I wanted to see my eyes, I would look to where I thought they were and be able to see one eye at a time and nothing around it. I would move around my face and in my mind, put it all together like a jigsaw puzzle!

 

So if I were to be given sight? I would be able to see my full face and even what is around it. Like what is in the room. Or a long mirror and I have to add wide, hehehe, my full body too? Really? How would this be? Gosh, really, it’s so far away this thought, it’s scary when you begin to analyse it all. But then after the shock, comes the living.

 

No more hiding away, no more fear of the outside world. No more summers stuck indoors. Picnics, parks, scenery streams, rock formations, birds bees and butterflies. Green grass. Colour green, yes, reminds me what is green? I have a vivid imagination of that colour, but when I think of it now, it’s almost grey. All my colours are turning grey. Red is one of the last colours I remember, oh, and blue. If I really think hard, yellow and purple. But fading they are so fading to the back of my mind.

 

It’s so weird to think of seeing again. As for a third of my life has been with closed curtains. But now my mind sees what’s before me. It’s so odd. I have pictures as though I can see, if I’m putting something in the microwave, I can see a microwave. Now sometimes I forget and see for example a red dish. I ask my Son to pass me the red dish as he is closer to it? He replies, Mum its blue. Blue? Really? Then I remember I had a red one the same some years ago. Before I lost my sight, but in my mind, the dish I would whisk things in, was red. All the time it was blue, but my mind’s eye saw a red dish. So a white microwave? Nope, it’s silver.

 

So I would go from my mind seeing, to my eyes again seeing, so I doubt it will be like turning on a light. I would have to teach myself everything again. Oh but I would make a great student, so please miracle man or woman, keep those experiments going and don’t give up the fight for sight?