CHATTER BOX

A relieved Fifi Blogget you have found here today. It was the day of the

D dduuuuuuuuuooooooouchyoucha, dentist.

More on that in a mo jo.

First yesterday. I had a lovely day with my friend Beany. We went to look for wall paper. Exciting or what? I originally wanted a paper I picked from another shop; it was lovely, very tactile cream background, with a dull gold leaf and pale or bright red flowers. The flowers started off bright red, and at the tips, looked like some white had been used for the edges of the petals, as they were brighter again and whitish at the ends.

Cream will match anything I pick for the sofa, and brighten up a darkish room. The dark gold will match the picture frames I have on my walls and the red flower, because I wanted to accessories my room with red cushions, and red, I have already in my cream, turquoise and red rug/ blooming dog bed.

I also already have red roses in my vases and a red candle. My blinds at my window are cream background, with the same turquoise that is in the rug. I like to depict colours in a subtle way, as well as obvious.

Oh as well as an artist, I would have loved to have been an interior designer if I could see. I laugh with Hubby and say

“What do you reccon about me being the first blind interior designer in the UK? He says I’m not sure you would get much customers, but, I know a lot of my friends where I used to live, used to pick me up  when they were buying things for their house, so I could advise them. its amazing just how many sighted people actually don’t know anything about putting things together. I just love love love it.

It’s like a passion.

My best friend’s wife, lovely known as SPF, sent me details of a local paint shop. Bless her ballerina pumps, for doing so, as the shop had some beautiful paper in there, which I really fell in love with.

OK, so for the main wall.

“I’m not boring you, am I?

It is a cream paper, with thick tactile lines going down. There are dull gold flowers every now and then on the paper. On the other three walls, same lined tactile, and I mean, really strong lines, same dull gold, but this time, rather than flowers, like knots. I love it. And if we get the black leather couches, with the turquoise and reds, will look beautiful. I would like huge cream velvet cushions for the sofas too. My ceiling light is like a candelabra. It’s black with glass bulbs, for the flames. I have a black wall light too, but I don’t like that, so may look for a gold one, with either a clear shade, or red one. What do you think?

I’m really excited about it. Just need my painter, to answer his phone now. It’s stopped ringing, just goes onto answer machine now. So he could still be on holiday, left phone at home and batteries have run out?

Oh I hope he will be back on Saturday, as he really really is great.

When I get my lounge done, I will be happy. It will be well on its way, to looking like my house/home. This is why I love our conservatory, because I wanted one for years, didn’t get one at the last  house, it was a bigger house, so didn’t really need another room, but here we  did. Hub and I designed the lay out of that, and I love it. There is our room teen’s room to to do, and the bathroom, which is not good, when I can be lying in the bath, and a blooming tile drops on me? Ha.

But before I can get that done, it will be either a lotto win, or many years to go after we pay a huge chunk of mortgage payments off. Well, if I sell any books before then, perhaps? A girl can dream?

Oh, I have such expectations for my future you know? To see, oh tears come to my eyes when I think of that. My Husband hates talking about it, he says it will never happen in our lifetime. I really hope it does. I know from Sweden, there is a professor who reads our blog page, so if he reads this, let’s hope he is inspired, to go to his lab? Haha.

What are you saying?

“And create some new wall papers? Hahahaha. Cheeky.

So after we brought some samples home, We went to lunch, Beany and I. to our Lewis’s Chinese restaurant, though Lewis is from Malaysia.

It was packed. We had the best lunch and I struggled to hear Beany’s quiet voice with my stupid deaf ear, we still had a great time. I really really like her. Lewis was adorable as ever, though he seems rather sad these days. My counselling side wants to help him so much.

Came home, had a coffee, teen had the kitchen stinking of his lunch, from work he had his break.

I was so proud of him last night. He worked from 7am, till 5pm. He came home, had his tea and at seven in the evening, he received a call, begging him to come in again. There was one guy, and he was the manager. He was really struggling without help. So after my boy, had asked him about hours and made sure he would be paid right, haha. He went in till ten.

My hero.

I must say, I really have been impressed in what he has achieved. I know to him, it is very low wages, but, he has shown he is not a quitter. I just pray to my Mum in heaven, that she will help me with him at this difficult stage in life.

It is really now, when I need her, well, many times in teens life actually. First day at nursery, when I came home from dropping him off. The fear I went through that day. I had never on my own, gone anywhere, since I lost my sight.

I had no white cane or dog. I didn’t know the route to his nursery. He at three, helped me there, by telling when the steps were and road was clear of cars. Coming home was simply a nightmare. One part of the walk was grass at each side for absolutely ages, with off cuts going into other directions, but no cars, so in the middle of the countryside with no cars to hear where a road was or people to ask or follow. It was me in a huge land. Other parts were three busy roads and the biggest housing estate, with steps, speed ramps and cars parked. Gardens which came out to meet you, all open planned and some gardens were small, so the pathways snaked right next to the houses. Some gardens had those small decorative fences easy to trip over.

There were children’s bikes  across the paths, and of course without a dog or white cane, I didn’t know they were there until it was too late.

It was a nightmare of guess work.

I would get home and it was time to fall to the floor, with pure fear and relief. It was then I needed my Mums arms around me.

That first day of nursery, I will never forget. I had many more days liked that, until I admitted I needed help, or should I say excepted help. I had to admit, I was blind and not the person I was brought up strictly to be.

My x, couldn’t even be off work, to go with me on that first day of my boy’s nursery. Though it was years before then, I knew, it was me and my Son. The day he was still in my stomach. I knew, we were on our own.

Anyway, I am a much better person now days, stronger. Harder, though last night, I was not so strong, I phoned my dear DD, my adopted Dad from the UK, who lives in the US now.

Poor thing, has had yet another operation. He is on his own and I just felt so dreadfully sad. My Hub, wanted to get on the flight today and fly to him. I am worried sick about him. I know he has a fantastic neighbour, who loves him, and will help when she can and Yam has left him with one of those buttons you press if you need help.

I still wish I could be there for him, to feed him and change his bed, though I will never know, how Yam does that, as I have never seen such an enormous bed? I am not joking, the bed is the size of our entire bedroom.

Hub says he is going to call him, every couple of days. I just wish they lived closer, as he really means so much to us.

OK, so today, was the dentist. We both had appointments and I put Wagga’s harness on, she did amazing.

Ten out of ten, though there were some evil spikes which reached out to poke me in the eye on the way there.

It is a really long walk, but did me the world of good.

I can really do anything with Hub with me. On my own? Rubbish.

Oh, my friend will tell me off, I have  put a question mark above. Hahahaha.

I could always delete it, but, neh.

My dentist was  fabulous. A true professional. Sadly, retiring. With age, comes experience and compassion.

I called in at teens shop to buy some milk, cheese and a couple of other things. Teen was on the till, but  didn’t serve me.

It is the oddest thing, to see  your baby at work.

I asked him today, to go with me to the hospital on Monday, oh,  yes, I’m falling apart. But, he said no. He was going to be with his girlfriend. He is going to her Dad’s after a late shift on Saturday, and staying till it is time to work the next week. Shame really, now on my own, and taxi’s both ways. Too deer, and stressful, as obviously, I don’t know my way around the hospital.

Right guess I should make hub some lunch. Until next blog, I bet you need a cup of something now, as this is a heck of a long blog. xxx