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Wednesday 9 November 2016

DIARY OF THE KILLER CEILING BY FIONA CUMMINGS


As the night starts to close its curtains, my heating is turned on and a candle crackles on my windowsill. I have just come in from a walk with my Waggatail and I can tell you this part of England is soo’oo’oo cold today. It’s really dark and it’s only five in the afternoon. Outside had an amazing smell of the bitter cold and our local chocolate factory. The smell of the chocolate mixed with the icy air is amazing. Our avenue of all sorts is so quiet today. I walked home with my friend and her Husband the other night it was the first time my friends Husband had seen our street as he until recently has worked abroad. He loved our avenue and said it looks so new, well I guess it is really, especially in comparison to their houses. Mind you, their house is so lovely, their kitchen is enormous. But our street is so nice, I’m really glad we moved here. I don’t like the pollution that is given off in our town and even surroundings, but our street is very homely.

 

The leaves outside are huge and crispy. When you can’t see where you are walking, you just never know where you are putting your feet until they are down. I guess if you had a white cane, your cane will detect things like stones, gravel, leaves and rubbish that may be laying around. Thankfully we don’t have that here, rubbish that is, unless it’s been a very windy day and the bins have tipped over.

 

So, you could put your best foot forward and if it’s been raining, you could slip if you stand on wet leaves, but when it is cold dry and the leaves are crispy, it’s beautiful walking, feeling how cold it is and coming into your lovely warm cosy house.

 

So, are we up to date with my blogs today? My insurance? The man came it was a funny story. He was due between 12 and 5. At half two I called them because I was told they would call me to give me a two hour slot. The lady went away and came back to tell me that he is driving right now, but would go to another house and then call me… The call would be within fifteen minutes, no longer had I put the phone down, when a knock at the door. It was the man. Haha, so, a phone call? Oh, he came in and first question was can I plug my computer in please Mrs Cunningham? Me, Mrs who? Well, I let that ride and onwards and upwards. He plugged his computer in and   started to tell me I had no chance in claiming. Oh my, so if I can’t claim for a huge crack in my ceiling with the shower running through, what can I claim for? I knew I had a battle on my hands, so I began to work on the man’s kinder side of his heart.

 

Almost one hour later, he said he would write his report and I will hear in a week. Oh, but that was after he asked me to leave the room whilst he did a test?

 

He went to his car and came back with a mask. Haha, only me this could happen to.

 

A mask and me leaving the room? He was only testing our house for asbestos!!!!

O

K

Pick me off the floor right now? He said if we have asbestos, the whole ceiling will have to be removed. Oh, great. So now I’m waiting again, this time for an answer to see if our lovely house can kill us?

 

Well, now I will tidy his dirty foot marks up. He was a nice man though. He will be even nicer if he gets my insurance to pay up. I know next year our policy will suffer, but it’s the fact I can’t look for trades men, I don’t have any energy to do that.

 

 Well drama in our house tonight. I’m not sure what the heck is going on at the moment, I think a certain person has been spraying themselves with a can of red mist.

 

Words before I go.

Embrace every circumstance, own every fault, share every joy, contemplate every mystery, walk in everyone’s shoes, heal everyone’s heart, adore all Gods, preserve everyone’s dignity and speak humbly of yourself speak candidly so that you cannot be misunderstood       and let every syllable treat those who need help.

Neale Donald

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