Good evening Bloggets. Oh what a few days? Is it over? This morning I hoped that my Husband would go to work for half an hour and then go to pick up Little Fella. But the vet wasn’t finished with him. He passed blood last night. He didn’t want to eat last night either. Hub sounded dreadful over the phone. Was he hiding something from me?
All morning I felt sick. I was shaking my heart was pounding. Our boy still had bits of something he ate inside of him. They wanted to see if he would for want of better words, pass whatever. I was glued to my phone and emails. I just don’t know how Hub was able to work in such worry, stress and conditions. I kept crying I missed our other dogs today. Didn’t help that I knew my friend was getting her little dog put to sleep.
I had to stop crying. The man was coming to fit our door. What would he think? I had doorbell gate again. A knock on the door, not the bell and I went as soon as soon was possible. I knew there was no one there because the air was thin. May not make sense to those who can see.
I stood on my door step and shouted in the direction of the voices hello.
No answer so shouted again. So it was a sales man trying to sell me a new door?
No, I heard the man run, yes, run down the path at our neighbours after talking for about thirty seconds.
“Oh,”” he said
“You are in?””
I just answered yes, I have never been out. I was always in. He then had the cheek to tell me to go to collect my parcel next door. I told him I wasn’t going to collect it, that was his job and if he had waited the twenty seconds it took me to answer the door, he wouldn’t have had to go next door.
So he went back to the neighbour, got the parcel, said some words then gave it to me and told me to have a nice day. Now how long did all that take? What is wrong with people?
Then cry number ten and another knock at the door. This time it was an Irish lady. In a broad accent, she said and I kid you not.
“You. F. O!”
O
K
Well turned out she was trying to sell me a different cable supplier called UFO. She went fast and I once again closed and locked my door.
Should I call Hub again, just one more time? I called him twice by this point and it was almost two in the afternoon. I couldn’t. I knew the office today was in a bit of a state too. The guys were working really hard trying to make old into new. As well as look after all they do so well.
My door man was due at one, he was late. That’s OK in the principle of things.
I wrote a poem prayed and tried to speak to my angels. I have gone through a very odd spiritual journey of late and I have not enjoyed it at all.
I received an email from my Husband telling me his internet at the office would be down for an hour. Some security thing I expect. He said if I needed him to call his work mobile but I didn’t want to bother him as each time I call or email it’s removing him from his important job where he has to have a clear mind for. As I said, not sure how on earth he worked. He said he felt so bad, so ill as if he were going to pass out. He had a dreadful migraine today as well.
Two in the afternoon and still no door man, but ten minutes later, a phone call from them saying they would be another hour. I said as long as they knew that when it got dark, I had no lights in my hall. I thought it was just a simple case of a light bulb, but come on, no, nothing for us is so simple. Teen thinks it’s electrics as he put the bulb in for me in his lunch hour as I couldn’t do it, I was up the ladders screwing, pushing, pulling and hoping, but nothing happened. I couldn’t get the blooming thing in? Why? Your guess is as good as mine.
Then I received another email from Hub. Telling me he was going to phone the vet, but he wasn’t sure LF would be home today.
At this point I ran upstairs and went to my Dads photograph of him and me. I talk to my Dad when I need help. Something I never could do when he was alive. My parents loved me more than my oven ever could I was born by evil to go to a family who wanted me. I adored them both but couldn’t talk to them about anything. I learned as a very young child of four I had to keep things to myself. At six boarding school clarified that for me and then I married so very young, twice I tried to talk with people who I thought I could trust. I tried to reach out, but again, so wrong a big mistake. But now my Dad has moved over to another land, I feel him through the window of a glass that leads to a photograph of him and myself. When times are, tough I go to where I have this picture and just talk. So, lock me up, say whatever, I know in my heart there is more to this world than just earth this world, this universe or whatever you call just life no matter what form we see hear feel or think of it in.
Dad, please make our boy strong and bring him home where he belongs? Dried my eyes stood for a moment and just waited then came downstairs and composed myself as a van pulled up and this time, my doorbell rang. It was the man, he could have been anyone, he said. Is this the one?
Well, depends which one and what do you want to do with one?
I just said yes. Heck what was I saying yes to?
I came in wouldn’t it be funny if I left the front door open then came away closing the inner door and leaving my delivery man on the door step wondering what he is to do now with his little pen and machine?
But no, it was my door man, as I heard sounds of him removing our front door.
Heck.
I hope it was him? Smile, joking. Yep, Joking, the word which has left my heart, body and soul but remains in my brain. I can spell the word joke, say it even but don’t really feel it by now.
My Waggatail was still hyper from the morning. This was the first time in about seven days she has been herself. Since LF had to leave us last week for his first overnight stay the night before his scan to see what was wrong with his leg. That is when he ate the dreaded cushion. I am sure it was a beautiful cushion, but not after it had been devoured by the beasty boy.
Today Waggs woke well and ready to have fun again. I totally trust my dog’s intuition, and only after years of experience of having dogs do I know they are psychic.
I asked my door man if he wanted a coffee. He did. Milk with two sugars. Made and gave and came to my lap top. Hesitated. No, I didn’t want to know… Then I went to the kitchen and started to prepare dinner for the family.
Four of us for dinner, or two? Not sure so made enough for, four.
No, I had to come back to the lap top and went into my mail. I wanted to see my Hubs name. but then I didn’t. Then did again. When we lost Long Chops last year, AKA Suki, I called the office knowing she wasn’t well, one of the girls told me in that kind of sad voice that Hub was on his way home. Well I just knew, I just knew he wasn’t bringing our girl back. It was then when my little Waggatail became very insecure.
So would there be an email? If not why not? Was he on his way home again, too early?
So, if I called him, he wasn’t there, were we going to live through that hell again? But there was an email from him. Dare I open it?
I did and it read.
Hi love, I think I am going to bring him home.
OMG. Really? I couldn’t even reply. My fingers were trembling. But in my doubtful moment, I wondered if he was coming home to have his last few days with us? No, no, believe your heart, know your other dog, Waggs was happy. Bringing me her toys. Waggs felt he was going to be OK.
So my door was fitted but because there was gunk on it I wondered if I should ask Hub to come in the tradesman’s entrance. Smile. So I unlocked the back gate and called him an hour later. He would be in transit. I told him to use the gate. He sounded shattered. Exhausted as if every bit of energy had been poured out from him. He has probably had four hours sleep in three days.
I asked the question. Do you have our boy with you?
My world stopped. My heart jumped out from my chest. I caught it and crushed it as he paused then answered in a very deep and meaningful way. Meaningful as in he meant what he said but had no emotion in his voice. He was flat. He said he had LF.
I asked if he was OK? He replied when I get home love.
Oh no, please? It was so frustrating.
Well Waggs ran to the front door. Yesterday, she didn’t get out of her bed to greet her Daddy and he is king to her.
I heard the back gate. My poor baby. He would be so sore. Sleepy too. Hub brought him in. What to do? Hug him? Get my excited voice out for five minutes? Dance? Scream with delight? Cry? Throw my arms around Hub? Pick up my dog and sit with him on my knee?
I froze. Too afraid to touch him in case he was hurting. I asked if he would be sore. Hub said yes, he has had tubes ex-rays and drips up his back end, down his throat and so on, he has a cut of hair shaving even on his throat as they had to ex-ray there to see if there was anything stuck in his throat. He has about six bald patches on him. As I felt so sorry for him, he went to his dish… Then ran to see Waggatail. It was as if they ran into each other’s arms. I went to them. Put my hands down, Waggs was wagging wiggling all in wonder. Their heads were touching, they spoke. He was home. He was back where he belongs.
LF is on a special food and starts tablets tomorrow. We are not out of the woods yet, but we can see the wild flowers near the oaks. I’m going to bed soon, I hope, more tomorrow on that, and I will leave our bedroom door open. But now he is in his bed. He ate his special canned food. He hasn’t drank but looks OK. Stinks mind you. Not a nice smell. He hasn’t even been to the toilet they said he may during the night… Nice, not again? I don’t care, he’s home. In his bed, next to Wagga. Not sure which one it is, but one of them is snoring like crazy.
Let’s see what tomorrow brings? He has to go back to the vets. Do you want to know the irony?
The lady who had to put our Suki AKA LC to sleep last year, said to Hub. “I couldn’t save your dog last year, but I was sure I was going to this year.””
Hub wanted to cry just then. Let’s just hope please that our little life savers life will be saved and please Bloggets, watch what your dog eats in the future? He ate something that caused an infection that stopped him from eating his food, drinking losing so much weight in such a short time, he had no life in him. All because he ate material. We are worried because he is still bleeding when he goes to the toilet. After his vet, tomorrow, I hope he will get the all clear.
Goodnight, and thank you for all your kind words and thoughts. X
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