SEEING REALITY

I dream I can see. I see in my dreams just as I could when I was partially sighted. The only difference is, I seem to cope in the dark. I used to be totally blind in the dark.  I hated it. An interview I did yesterday the person was telling me that she had poor vision where she couldn’t see at nights. She dreaded this time of year as it was the start to six months of not being able to go out in the evening. Funny, I remember some months ago I was cleaning our dog run in the dark. It felt so liberating. Some would think that was weird. I got such a buzz out of it… Am I sick? Picking Poop putting it into a plastic bag and swilling with water cleaning liquids and a strong brush. It was pitch black, but I saw the same then as I did during the day.

 

When I could see, no way I would do that.

 

I lay in bed last night and I was sure I could see. It was really odd. Kind of spiritual. My eyes are playing tricks on me all of the time now. Do I like it? Hmm. Not sure. It’s so different to the early years when I just saw dark red. Then light red like blood. Some days I was seeing black then brown peach then dusky pink. After about ten years I saw nothing, as though looking out of my elbow.

 

Today, I see shapes shadows, but there not there if you know what I mean. At nights I see the light on. I go to turn it off before bed and teen tells me it’s never been on.  I think the sun is shining, and it’s almost dusk at this time of year. So no sun, but to me there is? Sometimes I see the blinds are closed. Poor Canary, he’s Irish you know? Smile. I go to open them but they are already open. The annoying thing is in bed when the light is so bright. At first I love it. As hate the dark. It’s depressing. Then I get sleepy close my eyes so tight and still see bright white light. So what I see is something but nothing. My brain is playing with me, well; I wish it could go that one step more and see reality?