DIARY OF AT LAST I CAN BREATHE

Good day. I’m cold. It’s bitter out there. Just got in from shopping with my Wagga. Oh it was so funny, I will tell you without I hope hearing too much from our kitchen. Hmm. There is drama in there and I will tell you more in a mo Jo, but right now, I’m keeping totally out of there. You know what they say; if you can’t stand the heat, keep out of the kitchen? Haha.

 

OK my morning so far was one of once again interrupted sleep. Firstly boy wonder went out again at his usual time of 11.pm. By the way, this is after he spent the whole day doing great things with his friends. I’m delighted to tell you all he is so very happy. The happiest I have ever seen him well for sure the happiest for two and a half years.

 

We had drawer gate. Yes Bloggets, we are still assembling the drawers. I should say Teen is. Six days we have had them and I must say, they do look rather complicated. They are really long and there are six drawers. Well there is wood from A to B of his room. They came with no instructions. When teen asked hub why they had no paperwork with them? Hubs reply was. “Well, can you read Chinese?”

 He has been spending on average half an hour every day as half an hour is the time he has spent in the house. Homework? Naha. Days left at college? Em, about 16 all together. How many modules? Fifteen. Will he get his grades? I hope so, but he is going to have to really buckle down. Buckle down, where does that expression come from?  Meaning is applying oneself to hard work. Origin? Buckle down was first logged in the American literary cultural magazine Atlantic monthly, 1865 and funnily enough, the quote was written

“If he would only buckle down to serious study” but, it also could have come from an English phrase, buckle too, from the 18^th century, and from there 1712, was also written in the English story by John Arbuthnot “Squire South buckled too, to assist his friend Nic. The story was called John Bull in the law is a bottomless pit.

 

My boy is working today. He is doing a long shift. It’s funny; he even looks handsome going to work. And he works in a hardware shop. It’s perfect for him. He never spends more than a couple of hours at the same job. This keeps him happy as he can’t stand working on the same project for longer than a bird’s breath. Hence the drawers?

 

How do I know he looks handsome? Well one he is tall. Two his persona is one of cheer and gifted. Three he always smells so good. He takes longer to get ready than I do. All the smellies he wears. It’s funny hearing Hubs reaction. Hub shaves showers sprays and that is it. Teen, oh I almost went through his regime but I won’t bore you, let’s just say he has pride in himself. Only thing is he is getting to much muscle. I really really don’t like it at all. May look good, not sure about that, but to feel his muscles? As we are asked to do on a daily basis. It’s horrible. Yack double yack. I like toned people but teen is oh gosh, just so lumpy? He tells me what muscles they are that are sticking out. I’m as interested as a pig standing next to a giant frying pan some hot oil two bits of bread and a person grimacing with anticipation!

 Anyway, jog on. So up early as teen was at work so teen sup we are all up. Thankfully Hub slept through the home coming during the night. Teen text and my text as I’m sure you can imagine, isn’t quiet. So I got out of bed took the keys put on my dressing gown and went to open the door. Oh he was fine, not at all drunk. Thankfully. Then we had starving gate. He made a ham and cheese sandwich. Then started to put toast in the grill. Until I stopped him. I told him he was eating too much as he reached in the fridge for the cheese again for round I can’t remember of cheese that day. He is trying to eat dairy to build him up. I’m trying to keep or run a household and the huge block of cheese I just bought is half gone. Yesterday, he ate bacon sandwich for breakfast. Cereal too. He went out and ate fried chicken with a friend. Then came home and ate a massive amount of couscous with peppers onions and cheese. Then he ate a big dish of pasta with vegetables then more cereal and two bananas before he went out. Got home, ham and cheese sandwich a couple of biscuits and then tried for toast. As well as the horrible powder body building repair as they call it rubbish he mixes with milk. I mean, he must go through a couple of pints of milk per day to.

 

OK. He had a big breakfast today and took a big dish of porridge to eat in his break, with another two bananas. He has eaten three quarters of a loaf since yesterday, so about twelve slices. I don’t even eat that in four days. I shouldn’t even eat that in two weeks, but I’m bread mad. Though of late have been trying to cut down on it.

 

So I ordered the shopping this week on line and I did a very poor job. Forgot Hubs yogurts and milk for the family. So harnessed my little Wagga up and on our way we went.

 

Spoke to our friendly neighbours on the way there and back. Different ones. They as I have said before never let me pass without speaking, so lovely.

 

Well the wind blew so hard. The air was really cold. In fact nipping at my fingers. I wore a polo neck jumper. Yes, my jumpers have had to come back out. The trees though are growing and I slammed into two lots on the way to the shop. Wagga won’t guide me around them. Hubs Lc does.

 

Got to the shop, that awful lady told me to stand still again. And she went off to get what I needed. Two little children came up to me and the smallest one told me that she knew a guide dog but it died. I said the right things and then the older one told me she still knew a guide dog and it was dying. Hahahahaha. Oh I said to them, Gosh, I hope you are not cursing my dog? They didn’t get my humour. I hope it was blooming humour?

 

Well, paid by card got some money out and on our way we went. The road was busier than ever and the rain started only being prevented from lashing down because of the vast winds.

 

On my way back got the trees again so I stopped and snapped them I was so cross. Not the trees fault, they have more rights than I do, but the branches in summer develop thorns. Thorns rip at my skin and I have no clothes left with out damage.

 

Home safe a treat for Wagga and Hub took them both in the yard played with a toy tired them out and I groomed them.

 

Now, Hub is tending to his precious coffee machine. It’s an all singing all dancing machine. His pride and joy. It isn’t working right. He is moaning. Trying to fix it. I’m not going in there. So he is getting louder and louder as normally when he sounds in any kind of distress, I’m there quicker than you can say Jack Robinson. Today, I’m talking to you all.

 

I know for a fact he will be in here in a minute to ask if I will help him. Not that I am an engineer when it comes to fixing coffee machines. But I have more patients.

 

Our bird is singing his little heart out today.  He is really going for it.

 

OK. I must dash for now but glad to tell you that things in my life are slowing down and getting to a place where I can breathe.

 

Later gators. X

 

BABY YOU BY FIONA CUMMINGS

BABY YOU

BY FIONA CUMMINGS  

 

Tiny little fingers

Wrapping around mine

A squishy button nose

In your cot of pine

Cheeky chops giggling

Peepers getting tired

Little legs riggling  

So sweet only to be admired

Blowing bubbles

Full of trouble

Wrapped in a blanket

With a teddy to cuddle

I sing to you

As your eyes of blue

Begin to close

So beautiful

Mouth like a rose

Cute little dimples

Your age is so simple  

You sleep I hope dreaming

In nursery slumber

Away from winds and thunder

Just rainbows and smile sunsets

Flying on clouds of magical carpets

Over the lambs lolloping on the land

Lolly pop trees

Sweet singing blackbirds

And bumblebees

Dream little Darling one

And when you awake

Know you will never be a lone

Make no mistake

I shall be by your side

Kiss your tears that have cried

Put a smile back on your face

If your night is disturbed

And a shadow gives you chase

Know I will make you safe

This is a loving place

Where you never need to fear

I will wipe away

Your tiny silver tear

When morning wakes up

And the dawn dew surrounds the butter cup

And the chorus sings for breakfast

Together you and I shall have a feast

A pot of porridge

And a dippy egg with soldiers

Then out for the day in your carriage

To feed the ducklings on the pond

I love to see

Just how you respond

You’re so inquisitive

Fill my days with delight

Make me glad to live

You are so bright

Like the stars at night

Always free with love

And for that I give thanks to above

For whoever created you

Chose me to love you

To hold you

To teach you

To protect you

So you see wonders

With your eyes of blue

Little sleeping angel

How I so adore you

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

PERFECT PAWS BY FIONA CUMMINGS

PERFECT PAWS

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

Such perfect paws

Born for a cause

Loving eyes which I, don’t see

Though I’m told, you look up to me

Just waiting, for the next command

My voice or a wave of my hand

Out into the big world

Worth more than pure gold

You make a statement so bold

How do you do this my pretty paws?

With you next to me I’m never alone

I wonder if you know you were the chosen one.

For me you open doors

Stop at steps and wait at the roadside

How hard you work I’m full of pride

My needs for me you try

Waiting patiently whilst I buy

Hurrying to catch a bus

Never making a fuss

Without your help I wouldn’t leave these four walls

A blow of the whistle you know your recall

 Streight to my heal

Your nose nudges me so I can feel

My faithful

So beautiful

Wonderful

Because of you

I have a view

Of a world as normal as it can be

I wonder do you know, for me you see.

 What’s in front of me?

By my side, and far a head

A long day now, it’s time for bed

But first a hug

As I tuck you in on your rug

A pat to say how I’m so grateful

For you do this for me and in return

All you ask of me is love

In your little life you have had to learn

So much more than dogs who don’t guide

In comparison to you they may have an easy ride

 Though you are fed the best

Better than all the rest

 But are you aware of this?

Oh my little darling without you, so much I would miss

A chat with the postman

Who makes me laugh?

I would be stationed at my desk

But because of you I talk with the staff

I’m seen as more normal if you like

I can go to places at night

Experience culture

The theatre

The cinema

And the weekends

Spending times with friends

You make this possible

A visit to the hospital

Where you are so well behaved

But you love to play when you are not on duty

And you are such a little cutie

Sometimes naughty

But how can I tell you off

When your days are spent working so hard

My shining star

You and I have come so far

I want to tell you how much I care

And to the world I wish to share

To tell all of my respect for you

And all who work hard for your training

Little pitta paws I love you

So with few words remaining

I thank you from the bottom of my heart

Like hand in glove we are

I knew this from the start

Your paw print printed in my heart

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings  2015

LONG TIME NO TALK

Good evening Bloggets. Gosh, my internet has been really bad for two days. I was hoping Hub would be able to fix it today, but he has been working all day without a break. Now its night time and he is in the gym. Waiting for him to come in. I have just left him. Feel better when I get out there and I’m sure my neighbours will laugh when they see an over grown tomato popping out of the garage looking as though going to have a heart attack. Mind you I have never seen an overgrown tomato looking as though it’s going to have a heart attack, but if ever there is one, I look like what I imagined it to be.

 

Tonight for dinner? Very lazy Fi ordered a pizza. It came square. Never have I seen a square pizza before. Oh it was lovely but ordering it was a little difficult.

 

All day I have been working writing serious stuff, not suitable for our Blogget land of wonders, though I have written some very heavy stuff on here. Anyway, I have spent about eight hours working with words and my brain is fried. So I got through to the lovely Italian man who speaks really poor English but his English is better than my Italian. I didn’t understand what he asked me. So just guessed it was asking where I lived? I started to tell him. But I couldn’t remember. Hahahahaha. Oh Gosh, what a clown.

 

Well, I thought he was rather rude when I told him in a fumbling manner where I lived. Only after asking Hub where we lived? LaLalalalalalalaLaha

The man replied “Hey?” I thought don’t hey me buddy? Hahheheheh I’m keeping you in business here.

Only to learn he was asking what was my order.

Oh that red tomato again?

 

Anyway, we understood each other and what made it worse was the fact that He knew all of my details as it all came up on computer. So I didn’t even have to remember where I lived after all.

 

What a very odd few weeks we have been living through in the Blogget family. Life has changed gone upside down and around the corner. But I think we have the map to learn the new route. Now, who is the driver? Just need to find one then I think, I hope we will be OK, but in the meanwhile, heck. Seriously, it’s been challenging. Really challenging. In so many ways that I have never had to deal with before.

 

On average about two hours sleep but so interrupted. Heart pains and anxiety as well as delight.

 

As for the champagne? Still on cool. As for my gardener? Still on cool. As for my wellbeing? Well, what can I say?

 

My Husband and Son are driving me crazy with their eating and health at the moment. Hub asks for children’s portions and I’m not very good at that and Teen is eating me out of house and home. His eating is random. And I don’t know what the poor chickens did to him, but he really ort to have a chicken farm. I know he is with the meat eaters at the gym who are basically walking just about talking beef cakes. They are telling him to eat eat eat          . As for drink drink drink? No, not sure who is telling him to do that.

 

Let’s hope he doesn’t’ end up like my ex brother in law? Gosh, I don’t know how that man is still here. The poison he has taken over the years is enough to fill the Atlantic Ocean.

 

In his favour, his wife cooks good food and he does exercises.

 

In teens favour? Hahheheheh. Well, I mock, but I never fry other than chips no more than once a week and that is at most. The boys eat mainly white meat and fish. Me? Nothing with a face.  Apart from potato smilie faces.

 

This is one of those blogs where I started last night and finished today. So now its late afternoon. Teen been to gym and now tennis.  This morning he did a job with our lovely neighbour. As for the drawers? I bought him some days ago, well; they are still a flat pack.

 

Home work for college? Still flat in his bag.

 

All week I have felt as though a train has crashed into my head. Today, better.

 

A couple of things I have been hearing about. One in places like Africa, where people can’t get to for whatever reasons the Opticians, there is now an application out for the IPhone where by you can look into the phone and do eye tests which go back to an Optician. You can be diagnosed through your or another medics IPhone. How amazing is that? Or is it? How accurate is it? They say very. You even get an eye chart to read on the phone which represents the real thing.

 

A well-known high street shoe shop in the UK this week, just so happens it’s half term for our children. So whoever markets this has really pulled off a great idea. By an IPad, you can get your feet measured. There are cartoons for children to look at and tell them what to do on there. All the little monkeys are going to beg Mummy and Daddy to take them for new shoes, right? Well, I’m sure that is the aim of the company. An expert on children’s shoe fitting said it won’t work as the human eye sees things like high instep and the way the children walk and so on.

 

You know if an extra terrestrial would blow up all satellite devices in space, our world would come to a standstill. It’s scary how much we depend on the satellite?

 

Why do we have to use things that we have to program?

 

Anyway, I still have loads to do around the house, not sure how much will get done as really just not feeling good at all. But here goes with a try.

 

I hope you have a lovely weekend tomorrow we are out to our town, well that is the plan. The way I’m feeling I do wonder if Hub may be doing it solo?

 

Later gators. X

I'M A PLEB

Dearest  Bloggets. So pleased to say life has the answer I think and it couldn’t be better. Still have the champagne on cool, but there is time. Keeping my family as one is a job in itself. I’m so hoping to see our girls in the summer and I have been trying to sort out that for two weeks. As next year, I don’t know what my Son will be doing our eldest daughter has  a scholarship at the Cathedral in her town and the little one, not that she is little, but she will be starting her A, levels so lots of hard work there. So this year to get them all under one roof is proving to be a challenge. Just thought I had it sorted then Hub through a wobbler. He has loads of things going on in his life right now too. So this Mama bear has had to guard her cubs.

 

But you know what? I see the sun over the rainbow and its getting hot in here. Well, I have just been to the gym too. I did almost seventeen minutes today and I’m feeling good. I wanted to do it today. There is nothing worse than going there and really not wanting to be there. Seriously, if you could see me getting on that bike? Oh my word. Thank Goodness it’s not a public gym. I would be laughed right out of there. I’m really tall with long legs so Hub can’t understand why I make such a fuss about getting on the bike. But I pointed out what I was wearing, and then had to laugh at myself. Really, I’m such a pleb. I was wearing the tightest jeans you can imagine and guess what on my feet? Latest hi tech running shoes? Em, nope. Fluffy bootie slippers. LOLOloLoLaLalahahaha Oh. I’m so professional.

 

Anyway the birds are singing. Sometimes I wonder you know if you live in a hot country, do you ever feel sad? What are the per cent ages of depression in those countries? And, if you live there, do you become spoilt and except the heat and take it for granted?

 

Today is lovely, some days I wish we could go to the beach on hot days or a walk in the forest, but we can’t but it’s still nice to sit outside. Even though it’s like the blooming motorway.

 

My boy is working again. He is a hard worker. I have his dinner ready. He is having minted new potatoes with their skins on and fresh green beans with baby carrots homemade coleslaw and chicken. Then delicious chocolate ice cream with chocolate sauce and fresh divine strawberries. What he is doing after then? Not sure but he has some new bedroom drawers to fix in his room. His old ones were about ten year old and they have suffered the teen years over the past two years. Let’s hope these ones he appreciates more?

 

OK, I received a text saying I had a photo to look at on line. Hmm. I have a feeling it was sent to me rather than the intended, my Son?  As it was from is friend. God knows what I will find.

 

Then I’m getting text asking if I want free lazar eye treatment? Bit late for me love and yesterday I received an optical express text inviting me for an eye check-up for new glasses. Hehehehehe. Do they see into the future? Yep, let’s hope so. Though will I need glasses? Hmm. Hope not. Oh guess what I did today? On line to friends on a social network I wrote some jokes asking questions, but forgot to put the answers.heheh.  OK off to find this picture. Scared dot com. X

 

  

THE WHEEL OF FURY BY FIONA CUMMINGS

THE WHEEL OF FURY

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

In a world full of fury

Where the word is security

Though nothing is secure

Where we beg for a cure

And wish for all pure

But those closest to us rebelled

Putting us through hell

Wouldn’t catch us if we fell

Or put us out if we were on fire

Place the blackness at their chosen desire

Sometimes we feel so alone

Though there are people around us

We are in the way and causing a fuss

So we hide

And go for a ride

On the wheel of life

Avoiding the spokes

As they will cut like a knife?

But the wheel keeps turning

And we continue learning

Though now the scars are burning

The road we are on

Keeps going on

There is no getting off here

Passing by those who are dear

But they can’t see us anymore

We are dirt on the floor

Behind a locked door

We try to strive for more

But like a dog with his paw

Begging in front of closed eyes

It is us who they despise

Why, what did we do?

Lived life so true

Battled through feelings so blue

I don’t have a clue

What we can do in this situation

Apart from being patient

In this huge nation

Surely as this wheel spins

Passing trash falling out of the bins

We will find our place in life?

Away from strife

A place where we, belong

But how to carry on

When all you want to do is sleep

But then you fall into slumber

And all you do is weep

As your nightmare is your dream

You are the deadly sea

When you were once a stream

 Salt sticks to your skin

What by now is wearing thin?

 Scratches scrapes

Bruises and wounds gapes

Bleeding from rusty cuts

Listening to constant tuts

Words that you thought were wise

Now leave you with questions like how and why’s?

These wheels on undulating roads with bumpy rides

Stopping for a drink of wine

From the bottle nepenthe poison

Someone made this potion

I drink with caution

But it’s been fed to me with emotion

So must be love, right?

Then choking I try to fight

As breathing is impossible

I fall off the wheel

Play the cards and deal  

End up with the joker

Stabbed in the heart with the poker

Like a cancer though not a smoker

How many more knocks can I get?

Though I’m still alive I regret

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015

DIARY OF THE DEVILS DAUGHTER

Sitting here in the conservatory, in the pitch black. No need for lights. Not feeling cosy. It’s cold. Batteries flat in phone so can’t turn heating on. Haha. In a right state. Guess what? Can’t find phone. Why? I can’t find where I have put my phone it’s so flat Hub can’t even phone it so hey ho!

 

Anyway it’s lovely and peaceful. My time. Hardly any cars on the road the birdies have gone to bed as has my canary and our dogs are sleeping in their beds. I have my cup of tea and my thoughts.

 

It’s before the witching hour so not afraid of the dark. I love the calmness of the night. I’ve not enjoyed today at all. Tensions are rising in the Fifi Blogget household. There is something I really really would like but sadly can’t get. I feel so helpless and so wish I had money to do what I wanted in life. Firstly would be to pay off something I feel pretty bad about and second I could treat our kids to the most wonderful holiday. But Hub is the earner and the money has to be safe enough to pay our way in life.

 

I have just put the lovely crisp white sheets on our bed, well, let’s hope they are white? They were when I bought them and I am sure I haven’t put them with another colour.

 

So Hub off to bed for a sleep before I go up there and no doubt wake him up as quiet, I simply can’t do.

 

OK, may be time to turn on a light. I can hear a tapping sound. Tap, tap tap. Like metal onto metal. No pattern, just tapping every two, five seven seconds. No voices or footsteps in the yard, but the tapping is coming from somewhere. Em. Let’s see how long I can sit here before I suddenly take off and run like the clappers and go into the lounge closer to the beastie girls of my dogs. Hehehe.

 

“Go like the clappers!” So the origin? Well, it’s not really used outside the UK, and even in England, it’s a saying that is becoming rather archaic.

What the clappers refers to is not entirely clear, but the most likely derivation is a reference to the clappers of bells.

 

RAF Pilots were oftern from English public schools and the ringing of hand bells were used to mark certain times throughout the day!

Bells were rung more vigorously as time was running out for the children to get to class or chapel. The image of boys running as the hand bells were energetically rung, fits the origin of this phrase rather well don’t you think?

 

Another sleepless night here. I can’t remember the last good sleep I had. I am sure it was three weeks ago. I had two nights in a row remember I told you about them? I have never slept like that in so many years. I totally believe I was being healed. Healed from the pain of torture of the past two and a half years of my Son with the most horrible cruel individual that the devil ever created. But the devil will want one of his own back, so let’s hope rather than the crown being placed on the head of a queen, princess or angel, more like the horns put on the head of a brash badly behaved Belligerent bitch of an Antagonistic

 Antisocial pathetic rude individual, and lead her into the flames of where she originated from.

 

In the meanwhile, I am not sleeping. But that is fine. I can cope with sleep deprivation. Because I’m not sleeping, poor Hub isn’t ether. As for my Son? Well, I don’t know how he is still standing. He was due to go to someone’s today by car and it was over an hour and a half. I’m glad he hasn’t gone as for him to drive ten minutes is scary let alone further. Whilst he is getting reds on his black box in his car, I really don’t want him driving miles. I just hope the person wanting him to drive such a distance will have a change of heart and tell him to come by train? He has had too many near misses not his fault but the fault of other drivers doing stupid things. Still though, too close for comfort. Also I’m not sure little Blue will stand the test of such a long drive.

 

Can you believe that it has been almost a year since Olga and her family came from Russia to stay in our town? I can’t. Gosh what a year? I hope her Son D, is OK. Think of him a lot. He truly made mine and Hubs day for our wedding.

 

 Wow, that was the summer of hell last year. A big change for sure. In so many ways. Not only with someone I totally believed was a true friend, but because of the above gruesome person with the horns, I almost lost my Son. If he has my eye condition, he could end up blind, if that may be the case, no way she would put up with him. God help it if she was to have a blind child? Her heart has been well and truly carved from ice, and that wouldn’t melt to a disabled baby. 

 

OK, the tapping has stopped. I’m still in the dark. The traffic has nicely hushed to one every twenty seconds. Through the day, when I’m in the garden, it’s deafening. Really awful. It’s almost like being on the motorway. I tell myself that it is the ocean. Hahaha. The whooshing of the waves. And when my ears are ringing and my head hurts? I have to say it’s time to go in the house and close all doors.

 

 

I’m starting to feel really hungry. This is the time of night when I love my toast. I have to say no. Having said that, I made a deal with my Son about losing weight and sadly the deal has to come to a big fat crash as Hub doesn’t want to do what I wanted to do for my gift of losing weight. OK, I know that my gift should be the fact that I have lost weight, can live longer and get into lovely fashionable clothes, right? Hmm. Yep, of course but what I wanted for my gift was a holiday. Sadly we can’t.  We don’t go anywhere or do much in life but we can’t go on holiday. I have spent ten days searching the net to try and find a holiday. It was perfect when I saw one. It took so much time I’m not joking, and today Hub said no. I guess he is right. We can’t. But I’m gutted. We don’t even go out for meals now. We don’t drink and don’t smoke. Don’t own a car so what do we do? Just pay bills. This is why I so badly wish I could publish commercially, and then I could pay for what is wanted rather than needed. But I’m not the only one in the world that isn’t going on holiday.

 

If you are one of those people, we can have our Blogget holiday, right? Yep, let’s do that. In a couple of weeks, if I forget, remind me. This should be fun. I haven’t done anything like that before. I’m sure those familiar men in white coats will be back for me when we do this, but it will be funny. Right?

 

OK, so to poetry next. Gosh, what will these fingers type? I don’t have a clue. I never know. I write what I am given. I’m given what I write. The moral of this blog? Is there one? I guess there is, firstly, being happy with what you have. It could be worse. Also, don’t take fools gladly. And I can tell you, I believe in our maker. I just don’t know his or her or its name anymore. But faith? Yes, I have it back. X

 

 

 

 

BREAKING A LEG

Good day Bloggets. How are you all feeling today? It’s a cool day in the north of the UK and windy. But pleasant I guess, you just wouldn’t think it was coming to the end of May?

 

Sunday, what have we been doing? Well, cooking, cleaning and trying to sort out on line banking. Nightmare. When you can’t see it’s difficult, but we did it.

 

Tried to sort out the whites for washing too! Gosh that is stressful as I really don’t want our whites to turn pink or grey or any other colour.

 

Going in the gym later. How long for? Not sure. I was gutted yesterday as I have put on over one and a half lbs in half a week. I sware if anyone comes near me with a pin, they could burst me as I’m inflated that much. And what a mess that will be?

 

Its bank holiday weekend in the UK. Tomorrow most people are off work. It is the last one until August. I have never been able to understand why we have so many so close together, then a gap then another huge gap until the next year. It would be great if they were either put into one week or spread out a little more.

 

I have a huge lump on my head. I was vacuuming the kitchen floor and I bent over to pick something up. Slam. Bang. Right on top of the kitchen worktop. Full blast too. I don’t bend slowly. I totally missed judged that. I thought I had at least a foot clear on it.

 

Oh it really made me dizzy and I guess a headache is in store for me for the next few hours?

 

Hub did something I have only known him do twice since we got together six years ago yesterday, and that was fall. He didn’t know something was left in the garden and he tripped fell on his knee and wrote off a new pair of jeans. Huge whole in the knee.

 

So not being able to see means you spoil new clothes and have almost every day headaches. Nice!

 

A sweet friend of mine, one of my earth angels asked me the best question today. You wan a know what it was?

“Fiona, are you pregnant?”

Want to know my answer?

“Well, if I am. Call me Mary. As firstly I have had a hysterectomy and secondly, I would have to find my Joseph as my Hub, would divorce me. He had the snip before we got together. I was saddened by this as I would have loved a child with him. But we are blessed as between us we have three lovely kids. Beautiful too. Everyone says they are gorgeous looking and they are all very clever. Not that I’m bragging or anything. Haha haha.

 

Gosh, you Bloggets know I have been through the mill as far as teens go. But now? Wow, it’s brilliant. How long for? I guess until a certain person decides there has been a mistake.

 

My little dog is driving me crazy. She is bringing her toys. I played with her in the garden before and she has been out with me this morning so she can play on her own whilst I write.  So I keep her toys that she is bringing me and she goes and gets another. Then I keep that, so another and I have quite a collection. She will run out soon and the annoying will stop. As to my left I have Long Chops trying to put her long face on my lap top and to the right, I have huge sloppy toys. Lovely.

 

A       quiet canary, he’s Irish you know? Hehehe.

Not sure what makes him tick. Really, some days he is so noisy and others like today? Very calm.

 

OK. Must dash for now. Lots to do again. Gosh, I’m ready for a break. And not my leg. Xxx

THE DIARY OF EURO I DO

Good evening or good morning. It’s almost one in the morning. First time I have had, to come to my fave place, my comfort of Blogget land. I have a cup of coffee, guess who won’t sleep tonight? Haha and I am ready for a chat, again a quick one, but a very excited Fifi you have before you tonight.

 

So put on the kettle and join me please in a natter?

 

Oh I’m buzzing. What a great day. So much has happened. I’m on top of the world. I’m a little scared as don’t want to fall off, but with the help of our maker who I have made good friends with; I feel I will be steady.

 

Well, what with a busy in fact hectic day with the red hot sun on my face, I’m at last free for a good old chatter. Tonight Hub and I really enjoyed watching the Eurovision Song contest. It was in Vienna. The best performance I have ever seen in the thirty odd years I have been watching Euro. In fact, forty years? Scary considering I’m only 32, right? Hehehehehe. Stop it!!!!

 

I loved the entry from Israel. Ours was great and didn’t deserve to come forth last. As a friend on Facebook said, he has more points on his driving licence than we got in total. Really, what is the point of us being in Europe? They all hate us. It’s all politics now.

 

Russia came second and Italy third. The winners Sweden, hmm. I really didn’t like it at all and there were so many more deserving contestants who really should have won.

 

The crowd were brilliant. Audience I should say. The entertainment by the talented musicians of Vienna, were breath-taking. Hub and I really got into the competition. I am sure the best party afterwards too.

 

Leads me onto Island. They have voted I think 62% in favour of gay marriages. Hmm. Again, something I don’t believe in. I have nothing at all about two people of the same sex living together, even having a civil partnership.  But marriage should be between man and woman. I know not a popular thing to admit to, as I said I have nothing at all to say bad about gay people. I have always wanted a best friend who is gay as they are so lovely, the ones I have met and some of my relatives are gay and I love them. One of my Sons friends is gay and he is wonderful. But marriage? No. partnership? Yes, for sure. And they have to have the same rights as a married couple too and that goes as far as if they want to split up, they should be treated like those who marry. I know of a gay couple who married, and when they split, they just removed their rings.

 

Something else I’m very passionate about, there is a woman I think she lives in Germany, she is 65. She has just given birth to her 17^th baby. Dreadful. Too old. Puts loads of unnecessary pain on her child.

 

Well, apart from all of that, our gardener didn’t turn up as I suspected he wouldn’t. And I have a bottle of champagne to pop when I get the OK. Can’t say much yet, but this bottle is getting so fizzy, if I can’t let the cork off it soon, it will burst. Again my Bloggets, read between the lines?

 

Hub still a little ill sadly. But hopefully soon all will be OK.

 

I hope that our three kids will come out of this summer with good results for their exams. They are almost 16, a seventeen year old then teen eighteen. All similar ages going through important tests in life. Let’s hope teen sticks at college, as right now, not sure he will though he has only days to go before he is finished. Unless he decides to take on another year.

 

His car is still going, thankfully all OK there, though it worries me sick as I know it’s really not safe as it shouldn’t have a MOT. That is what he has been told by the garage. So the person who had it last must have got his from dodgy Dave. If you could hear it? Having said that, it has a happy feel and it’s really comfortable. It’s a cute car and I know the family it came from and they are nice people.  But the MOT can’t be a true one.

 

I told you he had a black box fitted? Well, so far he has had two reds. You can only get six in a year then they cancel their insurance.

 

Talking of insurance, we received our home renewal today in Braille. Oh my word? Really? If you could see it? Well, if I could see it, haha haha. It’s blooming enormous. Like volumes. If it were in print, I bet it would be three bits of paper. This? About 188 hehehe.

 

OK. Must dash life is crazy right now. I have four hours to sleep then up. I doubt I will sleep as my pattern is all over the place and I’m not talking about knitting.

 

Later with love. Hugs and jelly bugs. X

OUR FATE BY FIONA CUMMINGS

OUR FATE

BY FIONA CUMMINGS

The sun hasn’t Shon for so long

I sometimes wonder if I truly belong

The birds have forgotten words to their song

The leaves fall from the trees

 Summer paths full of cutting ice not nice

Like a knife, it does slice

I slip to my knees

Empty honey jars from ghosts of the bees

Souls walk past

Nothing ever lasts

A flame turns to a blast

Feeling like an outcast

In a tiny street reminiscing of a town so vast

 A sailing boat without its mast

A broom without the brush

Urgency not allowed to rush

Need my space an yet so crushed

No longer feel trust

The walls are built up

The chip in my cup

And crack in my plate

I wish I knew of what may come of my fate

The horse is out, through the broken gate

No voice to shout, and say wait

Who am I?

Are you my alibi?

My ally?

My friend till the end?

Can’t pretend

For this is real

Though I’m being given a very rough deal

This is how I feel

Dirt on your shoe

Last in line in a queue

Can’t believe what you would do

Your words are never true

Your reds turn to blue

And your black to white

I’m on the end of a string

Just like a kite

I’m not giving up the fight

My dark world will see the light

Though I’m getting weaker by the day

As the world is going away

Children don’t play

What more can I say

Even dogs have lost their bark

I’m the only one in the park

A shell on the beach

A preacher   but no one to teach

My arms are open

But there is no one to reach

  My words have spoken

But fall on deaf ears

A glass but no one to say cheers

The clown isn’t joking

And the fires aren’t smoking

It’s as though everyone has died

I’m the only one living

Bodies ask

And I keep given

It’s such a task

For they say no words

The cows roam

But no more herds

Their on their own

In their own zone

No one communicates

There’s nobody to motivate

Wherever I go I seem to accumulate

For silent souls, with lank hair

Eyes like coals, just stare

But there are so many of them

And only one of me

Where are the wise men?

Will I see normality again?

If I close my eyes and count to ten

Shall I waken

And realise I’ve been mistaken?

It’s just a nightmare

I’ve been nowhere

Just fell asleep in my armchair

But sadly I know this is reality

Its equality

Every person who has survived

Are all the same

They haven’t died

This is not a game

It’s a damaged painting without a frame

Such a shame

The crazy man with a fiery flame

And a wooden heart

Didn’t give consideration

Before he decided we must part

The button pressed

On our nation

He was depressed

Such devastation

Not a care for the rest

Who walk an yet don’t talk

Who look but don’t seem to see

But why me?

How come I’m like I used to be?

Is this my punishment?

Why have I been saved from this accident?

Will I be eaten as a sacrament?

Faces I once smiled with

Was it fabricated?

Just a myth?

Complicated?

Now a drift

In our ocean

What is the next stage?

In the magical potion

Should I take caution?

Will there be rage

I want to meet with our maker

And look into his eyes

For they will be so wise

I’m a mere mortal

Will I enter the golden Portal?

Stand at the gates of heaven?

Am I witness to the next life?

Will we suffer with trouble and strife?

What will we learn from our mistakes?

 Would we be given a second chance whilst everyone still takes?

What greed

Will the starving feed?

Will the wounded bleed?

If only we would learn our lesson

This world would be a blessing

But sadly the devil walks beside us

And it’s him we put our trust

Feel the weather change from calm to gust

It’s time to go now

It’s a must

So with my words I beg of you

If you care about this life, and I believe you do

Forget about fashion

Turn your passion

Into a peaceful action

End all friction

And dictation

Bring back to life this wonderful nation

For this is a gift from a higher being

But we are hell bent on destroying

Demons we should not be employing

Soldiers we shouldn’t be deploying

What good does war do?

Blocks out a beautiful view

Instead we see hell on earth

And for every death is a new birth

How our future will ever be happy

Knowing their destiny

Goodbye to a family

It’s come to the end

Never again will we have a friend

Just walk with the dead

Follow their tread

Can’t sleep in a bed

This is the trend

But only we can change it forever

Don’t wait until it’s too late

If we all stick together

Don’t let this be our fate

 

 

Copyright Fiona Cummings 2015