Who knows what our future holds? I wish I did. My Hub doesn’t
want to know but I’m obsessed by knowing, as right now there is a few questions
I have and answers I need.
My birth sign Aquarius, says I have visionary quality. Apparently,
I’m capable of perceiving the future and we know exactly what we want to be
doing five or ten years from now.
Really?
I, guess I know what I want to be doing, but how to do it is
the question and, at the start of the year, oh, I was full of this year I will
do what I want to do… Em, that lasted about 21 and three quarters of an hour!
Already this year has shaped up to doing for others what
they think I should be doing. What where and when, who with too! Weakness
should have been my middle name…
The next few weeks is going to be upheaval in my life, but
at least I will be kept busy. I also have quite a few poems to write for my Bloggets
for Valentines Day. I will be closing my office draw soon so if you want any
written please email me. I have a short story to write too which I have started
but there is a deadline for that and the clock is ticking. My email is at the
bottom of this blog.
A couple of my Bloggets have asked me some questions this
week so, here’s one of the questions followed by answers.
“If you got your sight back, what would be the first thing
you would do and why?””
Gosh, wow, em, cry with joy, laugh scream, jump up and down,
(God help the earth) just look at everything around me. If my vision would come
back to me in a hospital, well I guess look at the loved ones around me, I would
hope they would be there, take in every part of my beautiful Son, last time I saw
his face he was a year old. He’s almost 21 now. look at my Husband… Last time I
saw him, he was 12. Then I guess I would have to look in the mirror. It’s been
19 years since I saw myself in the mirror. I think a lot of shocks but nothing
not even lines of life would bother me. I really don’t think I would ever be
sad ever again. I think my life would be reborn for sure. I look at people who
can see now I just can’t understand how they have any days when they feel sad. I
know you only miss what you have lost, but gosh, vision for me would be the
kiss of life.
I’m grateful for my
legs and hearing too. Honestly, I do appreciate hearing and the ability to
walk. Never think I take those for granted. And just as I envy those who can
drive and see their children and grandchildren, but who can’t walk, I know they
will look at me and think well she can walk and dance. And those who can’t
hear, will know I can hear the birds, and laughter but I also know they can
see, drive and walk. And then there are those who can’t see or hear. I know of
someone who earns a fortune in his place of work who is totally deaf and blind, his brain is
enormously brilliant, but then there are those who never go out because they
are so depressed and I feel so very sad and angry for you. And, then there are
those abled bodies who can see, hear, walk and are so very unhappy… and I wonder
why? Obviously, there are things going on in people’s life, major things other
than the ability to walk free without chains and go where they want when they
want, hear everything around them and see the birds the flowers the smiles on
loved ones faces, but still they worry, they hurt. And then I wonder, what is
happiness?
For me, happiness is knowing that my loved ones are happy.
That is number one by a mile. I would much rather know my loved ones are happy
and they have good things in their life than what I want for myself. When my
Son smiles, I laugh. When my Husband chuckles, I giggle and when we all share
time together that is special, I have peace in my heart like no other feeling, I
just feel as one… whole, a full person.
If I got my sight back at home, as I have written about
before, I probably would decorate the whole house. Haha. Thinking, oh, my I can’t
believe I have had those colours on my walls in front of people! I would look
at the pictures on my walls, take in photographs, probably get the dusters out
for my windows, I joke with my friends now and tell them if I have not cleaned
the windows properly, it’s not me, they must have cataracts… Then I would step
outside. Wow, feel the air, splash in the puddles like a child, smile as I avoid
cracks on the payvment as before they would have bitten me and twisted my ankles…
look at my neighbours gardens and mine… run, just fly almost inside for sure. Jump
onto a bus and shop till I drop. Look at all the fabrics styles and not have to
rely on internet shopping anymore… I would go on holiday and just take in the world.
When I have done everything normal, what most people do every day, I would then
take a deep breath and search out charities who helped those who live alone. Or
who don’t get out of the house. And I would give my time to them. Because I believe
that loneliness is the most difficult disability of all. And along with
blindness can come loneliness.
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