It’s been a lovely day, quite sunny, still, no wind, but now
it’s chilly and dark outside. I have just put the heating on. Using HIVE. I
love that ap. When it works. We have the light too so I can be in South Africa,
London or New York, and turn on heating as well as lights in my house, how
brilliant is that? As long as my internet works.
Shamrock said she went for a job interview today and she
says she got down to the final group so, now, we wait for the next story. Will
she get the job? Will she be offered it but not take it because? It’s a proper
girly job, selling and applying makeup. I thought that she would have to have
some kind of experience or, and, have some kind of qualifications in make up?
But, obviously not. The job is a long drive from where she lives, but she will
enjoy it, it’s a much better job than what she is doing, she is far too young
to have the daily images that she has at this current job.
Next week Boy Wonder has to hand in all of his work to his
big boss. And then we will see if he gets promotion. It’s a big ask. Out of the
past 16 members of staff the boss hasn’t given one of them promotion. So, will
BW’s paperwork photographic evidence and speech, be enough to impress the big
guy? I hope so for BW’s sake.
It’s sad, he learned something today about his ex-boss who
he has stayed good friends with even though the old boss has moved onto another
area, something that has really effected BW. He now doesn’t want to keep in
touch with his ex-boss. It’s something he has been told about by his new boss
and his manager. I told him, not to take everything they say to be true. He
hasn’t seen what they are saying or heard about it before. It involves cruelty
to animals, cats. BW, is furious. Sickened by the thought of someone who he had
high regard for, to be cruel to any animal, but to one kind that he adores? I
pray it’s not true. I tell you, I am glad the old boss lives and works miles
away from BW, or I’m not sure how he would react at this latest news.
So, whilst my Hub is watching his drama, my house is getting
warmer, BW is at the gym and our dogs are looking tired sleeping in front of
the fire, I thought I would write a blog, about coincidence’s.
Let’s think about life? Those who say we are an accident.
Really? So, are our lives planned/mapped out for us, if so, by whom? If not,
are things in life just coincidence?
Let me think about what has happened in my life, and then
you think about your own lives and see what conclusion we all come to?
My parents tried to adopt twin boys. A week before they were
due to be given to her, she was sent a letter saying she couldn’t have them
because one had a rash on his face. In those days, they tried to hand over
perfect babies, and then she got me. Far from perfect, gold hair blue eyes, so
far so good, but then a year later my parents were devastated as they concluded
that I had difficulty in seeing. Remember in those days there were no on-line
support groups and there was nothing on the horizon with regards any kind of
treatment to prevent blindness. My parents knew of no one who had sight
difficulties. So, no one they could look up to and admire for their
achievements, whether it be University degrees, promotion in a high powerful
occupation, managed to cook a dinner or get out and about on their own,
visually there was nothing in the high streets/shops or signs about those of us
who can’t see. No large print signs or signs saying Guide Dogs welcome or those
turning thingies at the bottom of traffic crossings, just things we take for
granted now days, Audio? What even was that in those days.
To my parents, blind people had no life, they were helpless.
To be blind? How terrifying. They were so fearful for me, for my future. So,
their life was hell, they didn’t know where to turn or who to turn to
But, on my Mums death bed, she pulled off her breathing mask
and said. “Fiona, you were meant to come to me for a reason!”” I guess who else
would go through in life what she did? Her whole life was swallowed up by how
to fix my eyesight. She didn’t really have holidays, no fun in her life, my
poor Dad worked every hour possible to raise money for me to eventually after
visiting other places in the world visit Moscow for eye treatment. 32 visits
later, I was an adult now, and I chose to not go any more, but before that
choice, were parents dedicated to do their best as they thought/believed to save
my sight
What I thought of my journey around the world? Another blog
I have touched on before. Coincidence that my parents were turned down the
twins for me? I’m convinced without the treatment I received in Moscow, I
wouldn’t have seen my babies face up until he was a year old. Having said that,
to have that taken away in such a cruel way, was pure torture.
I was married to my ex for ten years before I decided to
have a baby. Loads of reasons why not before then, but I was quite happy with
my dog and didn’t at all desire having a baby. He came and he was as I said,
one, when I went blind. Without him, I wouldn’t be here now. at the same time, I lost my sight, overnight,
my Dad died not long after that, my Mum passed away, my world was over, apart
from the most important person in my life, my Son.
The urge for a baby came to me within seconds. It was like
nothing I have experienced before. Again, another blog, just what and how I
felt what I did, but it wasn’t natural, nothing about it was natural. Was that
coincidence, or was that my soul, my maker telling me that I needed to carry
on, and to do that I had to be given a reason to live. If my maker has so much
power, then why allow me to go blind? Do
I have a job to do because of my vision, or now, lack of it? If so, and I
promise to keep doing the job, can I have my sight back please? Smile.
I fell pregnant immediately. But then when I tried again for
another baby, it just didn’t happen.
My ex and I put our house for sale. It sold, I then took it
off the market. Long story. A year later I put it on again, we looked at a
house, we loved it. But in the end, it just didn’t feel right, the area I mean.
Thought the house was perfect as was the surround, so I don’t know what I mean
when I say it just didn’t feel right. We again, took our house off the market.
A year later, back on again and this time we moved to a part of my area I never
thought I would live in Northumberland. Out of every single person that could
have and did speak with me at the school gates, there was a lady called Sue.
Sue and I connected me with her in a very spiritual way. Again, Long and short
of it, we ended up good friends and went to a spiritual church. It was there I
developed my strength and there where I was given a message to say my life was
about to change in a big way. And it was two months later I met with my now
Husband. I had been taught to connect with my heart, my inner being, whatever
it’s called, just intuition, or coincidence? If I hadn’t have met Sue, I don’t
think I would have the tools to do what I did back then.
My ex, why did we marry? I often ask this question, but back
then when I was seventeen, my world had been turned upside down many times and
the only people I cared about was my family, especially my parents. They had a
hard life and were old. Out of all the proposals I had at such a young age, and
varied proposals, I told you about a Prince, in another blog, smile, well, my
ex, he would and did make the best son in law in the world, he helped me to
take care of my parents and he was brilliant, he did them and me proud for
that. So, did I marry him for that reason, or, because he would not pressure me
to have children, giving me time to prepare for my Son, ten years later?
After 28 years apart, I was reunited with my little first
love from school. We met up, and married within a year and will be together
forever. My Husband says, if I hadn’t have met him, he would have ended his
life too. Looking at the strong man I have now, it’s difficult to imagine
someone like him wanting to end everything, but he was in a very unhappy life
back then and felt he had nothing to live for. He felt very alone, unloved and
I guess he was. So, did I live for him? And in return, I found where I belong
in life? If treatment will be successful, for those with my eye disease, then I
shall be honoured to guide my Husband in a sighted world, just as he has taught
me to be guided and be independent in the world without sight, but, to have
more vision than most sighted people.
The year before my Husband and I got together, we were both
asked to go to the school reunion. We both said no, the year we met, we both
agreed to at least look on the website and it was then I came across his name.
He decided rather than go to the reunion, he would write a piece for the
website. I agreed I would look to see what people had got up to. The rest they
say is history. So, coincidence? The year we both agree to have something to do
with our reunion, is the year we chose together.
I have so many stories in my life where I could say are
coincidence or something other. I was asked to write about coincidence, so put
on the spot no time to think about my life’s map, as that is what I believe it
is, a map planned out for you, not coincidence.
It’s a little like Déjà vu, have you ever met someone that you are sure you have met
before, but you are told categorically, that you haven’t? Or visited a place in
the world where you just know where to go or recognize buildings? When you have
looked for a house to buy, or rent, did it feel right? I know when I moved
here, I got out of the car and just felt before entering the house, and bear in
mind, I can’t see anything, I just felt this was the right house to buy, and I
was in a totally new area of the country. Everything was just so different,
accents, people even, I had looked at many houses, much nicer than the one we
picked, and it was this one we bought, because it just felt right. Was I
guided? Or, was it coincidence that I moved here and around the corner was a
lady who I will I’m sure be forever friends with, a lady that has been through
so many things in life that I have and we can relate to each other. A lady who
by, coincidence, is from the same part of the North East than where I’m from.
So, my routes, traditions can continue through her and with, her!
Why do
we need oxygen to breath? If we are an accident, why are we all made the same?
With your tongue, feel the roof of your mouth? The lines are so exact. Why? Why
are our hearts in the same place and we have two eye holes in the same place,
and, only two? We have eyebrows to stop sweat falling into our eyes, we have
tows so we don’t overbalance. Why do we all, have five fingers? Why do we spend
so much money on searching new planets? Are we by chance looking for other accidents?
Have we found them and are we trying to kill them just as we are in some kind of
desperate need to kill the land we have been given, by accident!
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