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Friday 7 April 2017

DIARY OF WHAT IT'S LIKE BY FIONA CUMMINGS

It’s silly hour in the morning, I have just written seven poems. One I have put on my blog page, but not shared it to groups as it’s rather upsetting and on my Twitter account, I wrote painful words from someone out there. The others were for other people so I can’t write them on here.

People talk about how many words they write in a day, week month or even year, I can’t even work out how many words I write. Possibly thousands per week over three thousand I guess. Sadly, my talking software doesn’t tell me. My Husband has the same software and he can press the correct keys but for some reason my lap top doesn’t do the same. It reads it as in if you can see my Son said it’s on the screen, but my little man in my lap top stops talking and I have to end up rebooting my laptop as it just won’t say another word when I press the correct keys to do a word count.

My software is called Jaws it’s extremely expensive but it is a life saver. I order my grocery shopping on line and write letters. Receive emails write them and order Christmas, birthday and wedding gifts all on line. I have noticed that there are a lot of websites now sadly not conforming with the accessibility rules and some websites are not putting the correct buttons on their words.

We have a lot to remember with our software. For example, if I want to open a word document from new, I go into windows and write word. If I want to then open an old doc, I press the control button on my lap top and the letter O at the same time, then either write in the name of the doc I want, or bac arrow and go down the list of my files and oh my, I have thousands and thousands of files. If I want to save a document, I press the Alt key, at the same time as the letter F, then immediately afterwards the letter S for save to file. If I want italic on, I press the control key and the letter I at the same time and if I am on a website and I want to copy the website, oh it gets difficult, I have to press the Alt key, together with the letter D, then the back-arrow button then the shift key and right arrow, then the control key with the letter C and to paste it, I press control plus the letter V. What makes it more difficult is, my Husbands lap top is a little different to my commands. Though we have the same software.

My Husband tried to work out the other day just how many words I have written and he reckons six novels worth. I have always written, and loved it. I live to write, I breathe words and love the fact they connect people. It’s a lovely feeling to know that so many countries each day read what I write, it always amazes me and I never become complacent.

When I had sight, I used to write hand to pen and paper. I have written since I was about eleven, I think that was the first time I wrote something and enjoyed it so much I almost remember the day and the feeling.

My favourite time to write is during the night to the annoyance of my darling Husband and even my Son who has just not long been in himself, told me to go to bed, it’s as if my fingers are so itchy. I can’t sleep until I have had my fix and it is an addiction. A compulsion to write, anything, as I said in less than one hour I wrote seven poems I know someone a poet called Ronald, and I think he is the same, he just gets those poems out, the poetry I wrote tonight, six were dark my favourite kind of poems and one for a engagement, so to turn my mind from dark reds, black cloaks and pain, to love happiness and butterflies, can to some be a challenge, but for me it’s just like turning a corner.

To some my poems are words that mean nothing, to others they change lives or make them smile or at least stop and think. To me writing poetry is therapy. I like to reach out to people through my poetry.

I have to be up in less than four hours. Hub and I are going to try to get out on the bus and to our town before the Easter crowds. He for the first time said he wasn’t looking forward to it, he is a bit anxious. Gosh if he is, what about me? I’m the rubbish blindie around here, he is the expert. Haha.

We are going to a new place tomorrow, and as yet, not sure how we will do it. It’s a shame I can’t take my Waggatail, she hates noise and where we are going it will upset her with the noise and traffic. I know how she will feel… I use my white cane. You can’t use it properly in our town so it’s going to be bad, I will return home, I hope, but this time without cut knuckles where I have scraped them against walls and I will no doubt catch the front of my shoe in a crack in the pavement. If there is a huge square, and only one tiny crack, I will find it.

Also, there are posts waist level and I normally give myself some kind of injury by walking into one of those simply because you can’t use your cane in the way that it will protect you. Too many people I will trip them up.

Anyway, I hope tomorrow Hub and I manage to stick together and not get parted in the crowds. Especially because my phone is still not working. On that note, I better get some shut eye. Have a lovely weekend. X


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