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Friday, 15 December 2017

ELF AND SAFETY BY FIONA CUMMINGS


Christmas is all about showing people you care for them but what I don’t like is the fact that it seems to only be an action of kindness that comes once a year. Why be friendly, nice, caring, giving, kind and charitable only at Christmas? Is it because of all the magical fairy dust that is being used in the North Pol that is getting into our bloodstream and making us more calm, considerate, cautious around other people and in general more excepting towards situations we wouldn’t normally deal with?

 

(Elf and safety check list)

I got thinking about Christmas, about the big man in the red coat. The occupational health of our much loved Santa Claus. With all the sweet mince pies we put on a plate for Santa on Christmas Eve, I wonder if he could be a diabetic?

 Surely with the sherry that is poured in a glass or whatever alcoholic drink we put out for him, will he have liver failure? Is it possible for him to have some kind of silicosis, or pulmonary disease with all the coal dust?

 

With the stress of getting all his work done in one night, the risk of Santa having a heart attack would be high, if not for the fact that Santa Claus is immortal

 

Health and safety around concerns of his sleigh is disturbing to me. I mean he does do some rather challenging journeys as for the huge amount he carries on his sleigh estimated weight 1,232,300 metric tonnes and he has 75 million houses to visit and the distance on average between houses, is 1.63 miles Santa needs to cover 122 million miles. To go over that distance across 24 hours would mean that Santa’s sleigh would have to travel at a whopping speed of 5,083,000 miles per hour.

 

Hence the magic dust that is caused by the power of the sleigh journey. Let’s hope his brakes work.

 

Fiona Cummings home of lost the plot dot com

 

 

 

     

 

 

 

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