A strange subject at the end of this blog. But first just
life.
When you can’t see you rely on your hearing. And for a week I
have not been able to hear from my right ear. When I talk I can hear myself
inside of my head and there are enough voices in my head without my own joining
in the party. Haha.
I’m going to a hotel where there will be a lot of people and
I may be getting asked questions from the platform. God help me. As I doubt I will
be able to hear a thing. The software on my lap top sounds miles away, the
voice that is.
My Husband wasn’t well again last night. I’m getting
seriously worried. He’s obviously still working, but there is something really
wrong and we are waiting the long slow journey to get results, but firstly he
has the long wait to get the results taken. We have a two week wait before the
process begins.
It’s coming up to his 50th birthday and I guess
this is when everything starts to go wrong. I don’t like it. It really makes me
scared.
Thank God Sham is working so I may see my Son for ten minutes
today but moreover, he may have a day when he can do what he likes and that is
go to the gym and do what he needs to do as in his washing of his clothes. May be
looking at more jobs. He hasn’t heard from the job interview he went for last
week but as I said he has already decided he doesn’t want it. I must say, I wouldn’t
either. Not for the reasons he doesn’t want it for though.
Not long before his holiday abroad. I wish I knew he was
going to be happy and safe out there. Or going with sensible adults. I can relax
for a few days when he gets back and then he’s off again. This time Shams
country. And does she come from a beautiful peaceful part of lovely Ireland?
Nope, she comes in her words from a really rough part. So, to get a job now will be a little
difficult when he says he’s over two weeks abroad then back for a few days then
off again for three days.
He’s so special to me and I wish I didn’t worry about him
like I do. But I am a born worrier. I can remember worrying when is as as young
as four. No, younger, one and a half. A lad came up our street towards my
Brother. I really didn’t like this lad and I thought he was going to beat my
brother up. How did I even know about such things? It’s a very strong memory. I
was too young to explain myself but just knew how to cry and apparently, I was
good at that… my brothers friend brought me in the house to my Mum where she
just tried to pacify me by putting me on my rocking horse. That made me more
tense. As she was ignoring the fact my brother who was my hero was in danger. I
just kept saying his name over and over again. But thankfully he lived for
another day and future.
Around about that time too I remember my Uncle singing to me
though I I didn’t know he was my uncle at that time. It was years later when I questioned
my Mum about that dark night and a man with side burns singing to me he kept
saying. “You will be OK Lambie. Your Mum won’t be long.”” Then bursting into a
gentle song again. Bless him. It was the night my Granddad died. My Mum was so very close to him and wanted to
be by his side. I’m glad she got that chance. Sadly, I wasn’t able to do that
for my parents and this is a huge regret of mine that I can never fix.
Hub was with his Mum thank God. Gosh I miss that lady so
much.
Which oddly leads me onto a subject that is not too nice. Some
people we call Ambulance chasers. Those relatives who come out of the woodwork
after many years of not caring 1 per cent. Never even asking how the person is,
but then hey, the person who is getting old, reach a grand age, and suddenly the
chasers, want to be remembered. Totally pathetic. A joke but I believe in Carma
and they will get their day. We know of someone who cares for old people and in
their words, only those who look ill. And they are quite honest in their approach
by saying they are only caring to see what they get left. This person has received a huge house and a bungalow
and is onto her third victim in two years. Whilst receiving benefits. I think
she claims she has Arthritis.
The people are dying will be dead, so it won’t bother them
it’s not them I’m bothering about. It’s the morels of the horrid individuals
who commit such a sinister act! But what I always say, what goes around comes
around and I hope those we know personally, will get their day.
My friend is a manager of nurses and she told me of a lady
who was well known in the field of nursing to do this. I asked her why did she employ
her? She said she tried not to and offered her work with quite healthy people
but this person used to turn down that work in favour for other people who she
may benefit from. I just don’t know how these people can sleep at nights. But I
also believe that you are born this way. I really believe that there is such a
thing as an evil gene. But these people can never be happy. You can have nothing
at all but love and be the happiest person alive. You can have so much and be
happy too, or you can be devious, cunning, corrupt pure bad and survive. Life is
about more than survival.
Write a will please. Don’t let these people get away with
this.
Next blog a cheerful one I promise.
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