GRIEF BY FIONA CUMMINGS

Grief

Grief is a very short word for something that we all go through in life unless you are fortunate not to have ever experienced that. Personally, I only know of people who have been born who can’t show their feelings. Their emotions were never given to them either being able to show happiness or sadness. And that must be awful. And there are a few people who are just not nice people who don’t care enough about anyone to grieve for them but those latter people are few and far between. If it’s your pet or family member or friend you have lost, then you will have felt that dreadful pain of grief.

 

As I said such a short word for something that really can be so destructive to ourselves and even people around us. Grief is loss. Whether the person/pet has died or just gone from our lives. A tiny word to describe pure torment of such an agonising affliction put on our emotions!

 

Why do we have to go through this as humans? Some say if you have suffered grief, it makes you a better person. But why make it so bad? It’s a pain that never leaves us we just learn to live with it.  And if we can’t live with that every day reminder, then people end their lives causing other people to grieve. It’s a vicious circle.

 

How we display grief is impacted by culture. But how we feel inside as humans no matter of our background or religion, we must all feel the same surely?

 

It’s interesting to see how people deal with funerals across the world. I think the most bizarre kind of funeral is in China. Having a well attended funeral there is a subject of great concern in Taiwan, so to get people at the funerals, families hire strippers and arrange great feasts. Imagine that?

 

In the Philippines, people of Sagada believe the higher the coffin is to the sky, the closer the deceased is to heaven. Those funerals take part up mountains. And this is an unusual part of funerals staying with the Philippines, they also have the Tinguian funeral. This is where they dress the deceased in their finest clothes, sit them in a chair and give them a smoke. I read that there the dead can sit smoking for weeks. Oh my… why? I need to read more about the reason for that. And the fire risks? And, how do they keep the cigarette in their mouth?

 

The republic of Kiribati in the central Pacific, a few months after burial, the body of the person who died, is exhumed the skull is removed and given to the family to polish, preserve and display in their home. Sometimes food and tabaco are offered to them.

 

There is another place where they dig up their families bodies every five or seven years. Re wrap the body, dance with them an tell them stories. Oh my….

 

Some religions give the bodies over to the animals to strip the skin and the bones are grinded for the crows to eat. Now that is recycling big time.    

 

  My Husband and I have spoken about what we want when we die. I would rather talk about it now is when we are closer to the day. Though of course no one knows when they are to leave this earth do, they?

 

If you are grieving now, I wish I could remove your pain. But who can? There is a cure to be found but who is looking for it, so we don’t suffer so much. And when I have read about elephants grieving, oh, that hurts me so much. Poor animals, what on earth goes through their minds? Such a dark subject, I hope to write something more cheerful next time. Something that will even make those who are really suffering now smile even just a little bit.