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Saturday, 24 February 2018

AFTERNOON TEA IN TWEED BY FIONA CUMMINGS


So, if you read about my Friday evening, you will know I had a good start to my day. My friend Geordie picked me up in her posh car and off we went a drive through the countryside. I joked with her about the beautiful view from my car window. She’s like lady Penelope, driving at speed through the winding roads. It took a while to get there, about forty-five minutes.

 

As we got out of the car, I took in the country air, there just wasn’t any. Seriously, even almost an hour from here, and still terrible air. I could smell the chimneys from all the coal fires from the quaint little stone cottages and it was nice and quiet. We walked into this country boutique hotel with a tea room attached. Passing a roaring fire which provided lovely warmth on such a bitterly cold day. Oh, the people inside were a cross between very posh and farmers. Hahaha. And then there was Geordie and myself. Two lasses from Newcastle. Oh, it was so funny. Oh, my goodness. Firstly, a very posh speaking waitress who had obviously never left her village and obviously was totally involved with the farming world as she didn’t have a clue what a vegetarian was, if ever I felt like an alien, it was yesterday. Haha.

 

My friend said to the girl who sounded in her twenties. “When I booked a table, I mentioned my friend was a vegetarian.”” Well, the girl kind of hesitated and then said, oh, yes, no trouble… and, I’m sure she then went into the back room and took from an antique bookshelf a dusty old Thesaurus! Or an Butcher’s Almanac and looked up the word vegetarian, not finding the meaning, she came back to the table and once again tried to clarify what a vegetarian was. Well, my friend then said she doesn’t eat meat or fish. But she reassured the girl that she, ate everything…. Oh, I could tell the poor girl was so confused so I said. “My friend has the usual normal afternoon tea. I only eat things like cheese and egg, no meat no fish. My friend then said she noticed there were prawns on the menu. Reminding her that prawns were not suitable for vegetarians… it’s funny you know, but it’s fascinating just how many people think vegetarians should eat prawns…. I’m not kidding.

 

Then my friend poured the tea from a delicate tea pot. Into small teacups that our grandparents used to have for every day use… The kind I love that I have in my china cabinet. Oh, heck we laughed… My friend said, typical Geordie. A Geordie is someone who comes from Newcastle… she only poured the tea thinking it was a teabag in the pot and not proper tea leaves. I told her we had to be more refined, we were ladies out for lunch. My friend has a lot of money and wears beautiful clothes, she looks stunning and rich, but still her background comes out I love her for it. So, she asked what should she do? I told her just to pour the cup back into the teapot. Hahaha. She said I can’t do that people will see, I just replied, And? She said, what are we like? I answered, waist not want not…

 

Well the cup of tea was lovely and then came the three teared plates. One each. Luckily my friend Geordie asked the girl, by this point I was sure she had eleven fingers on one hand… “Excuse me, are they prawns in the sandwiches?”” The girl answered yes. My friend said I told you my friend doesn’t eat prawns. Oh, she said, sorry, should I take both back? Oh, my goodness. Take me out of here? We told her no, by this point my friend was hanging onto her plate, haha, this was going to be a challenge and we may be there for a while. Well, so what we had lots of catching up to do.

 

In the end I got the right food. It was lovely. There was finger like sandwiches on one level, on the other was cream scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam and on the top plate were different kinds of cakes.

 

As the fire crackled and the cosy surround with tweed wallpaper and something I really didn’t like, awards for shooting parties who could stay at the hotel. I joked saying fancy bringing me here? Then Geordie laugh trying to make better of the fact she told me, a vegetarian animal loving person that there were such awards and deer antlers on the walls, oh, she said, there are some lovely pictures of little bunny’s. I said, yes, saying look at what you can shoot boys and girls…

 

But apart from the fact that the hotel provided a place for the cruel murderers to wrest their bothered minds at nights, it was a comfortable ambience!

 

Geordie and I have so much in common. We are very alike in our past with regards marriage’s. Our exes are both well… how can I put this? Our ex’s. and we both have gone through similar issues with them. We are both from the same part of the world and ended up in the same area for similar reasons. She’s a great friend I love to be with her. It was a lovely few hours and I came back home in a really good fettle as we would say in Newcastle.

  

 

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