Good afternoon Bloggets. Wow, it’s wild here in this part of
the UK. The wind is so strong and it’s raining too. Sounds from my house, first
the roar of the wind, then the bels of my chimes in the garden, a gate slamming
open and closed then the odd plastic bin rolling down the street but very
little activity of people out chatting to each other in our friendly
neighbourhood as normal. I can’t blame them.
Our house is nice and warm, and after me unplugging our
heating HIVE yesterday, that is a miracle or is it Hubs technical skills of
getting it back to work. It’s all on line. Why did I unplug the heating?
Because we were putting up our Christmas lights and decorations, so I was using
the plugs.
Hub and teen in the loft bringing down box after box of
what? How they or Hub knows they are decorations, I will never know, I guess it’s
because they are put in the same place in the loft each year.
Teen asked us if we needed help but Mrs Independent likes to
do it herself. Why? Well, if I do it, then I know what it looks like, I know
where each decoration goes. I love to unwrap each bauble and toy and tell Hub
every year the story behind the toys. I’m sure he will think not this story
again, but he never complains and lets me get it out of my system smile.
I love the smell of our tree it’s artificial but I sprayed
it some years ago and the cinnamon and tangerine still lingers. I have gold and
silver tinsel and I would love to be able to put the silver then the gold, but
that requires sight and that is something teen won’t have much patience in helping me with.
Everything with him has to be done now in two seconds and he complains about
everything I ask him to do. Kids are dam selfish creatures.
I have a garland along my mantelpiece and lit up twigs in
the vase on the window. Teddies hanging from the ceiling and candles are all in
their places.
Today Hub and I ventured outside to do the outside
decorations oh gosh
that was so difficult. I’m sure I have hung the angel upside down again. I
flipping hate being blind.
We asked our son to help to take in the garden furniture for
the winter, been asking him for five weeks now. It’s still out there. We can do
it but to lift heavy stuff requires two hands and how then do we know where we
are going? Well, if it breaks it breaks.
I’m so fed up of stressing over my garden. There are more important things in
life.
So there I was, up the blooming ladders in the howling wind
with rain beating against my head whilst Jack Frost bit at my fingers. I couldn’t
feel them to tie up the decorations. We have a star a snowflake and an angel. My
lovely neighbour and friend sent me a text to say our decorations look lovely
so that made me so happy. As a blind person you just never know.
So to all those of you who are facing the darkness. Please
listen. I was you at one stage and the fear of blindness is the most terrifying
time of your life. It was for me for sure. When I first went blind, I wanted to
die. I couldn’t breathe my heart pounded in absolute terror. I was not
grieving, it was even worse than that pain. How could I laugh, even smile
again? Now I’m laughing with Hub putting up our Christmas lights. Looking
forward to the big man in red coming down my chimney…. Though I haven’t got a chimney,
but hey, I can improvise? Heheheheheh.
Don’t get me wrong, being blind is awful, I hate it. But we
do laugh. We do live, we talk about colours again. We match our clothes and
household soft furnishings. We plan a head. And, my Husband thinks I’m
beautiful….. Also, I can ask him when I’m getting ready to go out. “Does my bum
look big in this?” he will always say no. I smile as in his head; I’m a leggy
blonde babe. In my head I’m a tall bleb. With a butt that almost would take two
aeroplane seats on the way to Benidorm... But My Hub sees me for my voice and personality,
for the sweet perfume I wear and he says my brain….. He loves my hair as for my
figure; I guess it looks worse than what it feels like?
OK, Hub is blasting the oddest music. It is organ music. No,
not my heart beating or my lungs rattling, but organs from Cathedrals. But they
have a bit of kick in them… They sound more like a funfair. I can’t hear or concentrate,
so I shall go for now but be back as I have loads to tell you. So much you won’t
believe some of the stories coming your way near a Blogget page near you.
Until later with love. Some words before I close.
“Blind people can’t see a candle, but they can feel the heat
from it and smell it when it’s blown out. We don’t see the light, we feel it,
we can’t see when there is no light on, but we sense it when it’s off.”
Fiona Cummings
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