For whatever reason, today has been the most difficult of
all years. I miss my Dad so much. In many ways it would have been easier if he
had been born on the tenth rather than the eleventh. Remembrance Day. Not that I
wouldn’t remember him of course, just today is quite a sombre day for many
countries. My Son is oblivious to what today means to many, and he never really
knew his Grandad. He knew how to shout his name and recognised him at the time,
but he was a toddler when he died, so has forgotten everything. So today he has
gone to spend time with small animals in a sanctuary. He told me during
breakfast that he wanted a baby pig. Well, he better not bring one home…
So, I have spent the day cleaning and sobbing. Seriously,
thankfully Hub has spent time away from me so he doesn’t have to feel my
sorrow. I’m hurting like you wouldn’t believe. I just don’t understand why this
year is so bad. In fact, it’s as bad if not worse, than his first anniversary
of his death. I just don’t know why!
Our dogs didn’t get their walk. The fresh air would have
done them good. But the air was full of water too, as it rained very heavily. Now
the sun is out blasting through my window. It’s not even cold. I don’t have the
heating on.
So, to end my short blog, I would like to say a thank you to
all of those soldiers who went to war to do what they thought was right. Especially
those who didn’t have a choice. Those who were so young, terrified, those who
had a new wife or children back home. And for the parents, I can’t even imagine
what pain they must have gone through, to see their Sons go to war.
From one of my if not, my favourite poet, William Blake
I dreamt a dream! What can it mean?
And that I was a maiden Queen
Guarded by an Angel mild:
Witless woe was ne'er beguiled!
And I wept both night and day,
And he wiped my tears away;
And I wept both day and night,
And hid from him my heart's delight.
So, he took his wings, and fled;
Then the morn blushed rosy red.
I dried my tears, and armed my fears
With ten-thousand shields and spears.
Soon my Angel came again;
I was armed, he came in vain;
For the time of youth was fled,
And grey hairs were on my head.
I just wish we could learn from our past and live in peace. No
more wars end the hate around the world.
