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Monday, 26 March 2018

TO BE BLIND WHAT A QUESTION BY FIONA CUMMINGS


It’s beautiful outside. Walking today with my Waggatail I just wished I wasn’t among the pollution of life. Today was easy to step out as I received a pill of love and support from a dear Blogget from South Africa. He sent me such words that I will treasure forever and coming from him such an acclaimed person filled me with help I needed!

 

Our neighbours are all out in their gardens. The ones off work either taking holidays or retired. Digging cutting grass and so on. I joked with one this morning as he told me he was putting holes in the grass. “So, the rain and snow can get through and not flood?”” He laughed and agreed as we have been told that snow is going to make a recurrence.

 

I tried to make an appointment for my Son to see the Doctor but it was going to be 16 days. Oh, my goodness. Isn’t that ridiculous? He’s had a really horrid cough for six weeks now and it’s not getting better.

 

Our besties are coming to spend the day with us tomorrow. Hub is doing the cooking. He’s making home made bread too, so, it will be up to me to serve and smile. Hahaha. It will be a lovely day though.

 

I have been asked or said to this week some similar thing at least three times it’s odd that the same thing has been said as many times in such a short time. So, I shall try to answer by writing rather than talking to them and hopefully will be able to get across in a clearer way!

 

“What is it like being blind?”” And. “I, can’t imagine what it’s like being blind!””    

Firstly, I used to imagine what it was like being blind, as I, had that threat since the age of four. It terrified me so much I couldn’t sleep from childhood. I, used to be so afraid of the dark and ghosts. As they only come out at night time, right? I learned that no, they come out day time as well!

 

I didn’t like having black all around me. I used to put my fingers over my eyes but still I saw shadows and colours of reds and orange’s. still dark red I even closed my eyes so tight covering them with my hands that I started to see floating white lights. So, in other words, I was never really blind as a child, there was no practice, no dress rehearsal, so when the big day happened when I was thirty, my hell became reality.

 

I, can’t lie, waking up blind was 100 times scarier than what it was previous in my head. The world left me and I was so alone! I, shivered inside and out. I couldn’t cry. But it didn’t stop me from making sounds of pain and hysterical screeches. Fearful isn’t even a word that can describe how I felt. I wish as a writer I had the words to tell you just what went through my mind, soul and body at that time, But I, don’t. All I can say is it was the worse time of my life. Worse than finding out I was adopted, worse than boarding school and that was lifechanging. Worse than my very first trauma in Russia when I was six and worse than what happened to me when I was still a teenager that I have never written about but will do when I write my autobiography and even worse than losing my parents who I worshiped so close to each other in time. It was grief beyond hell, murder and agony!

 

I, had to start my life again. I had no teachers at the beginning of my new life living in the sighted world as a blind person. No lessons to go to. No internet then or books I could read. I didn’t read Braille and couldn’t read print. Doctors were then my enemy because of my travels to the USSR.  My only crutch to lean on, was my baby. He was totally oblivious of what was happening to his Mum thank goodness. Already he had adapted to having a Mum with sight loss, it just took me some time to realise that. As a tiny baby he adjusted faster than I had.

 

I will skip by the pains of opening my eyes each morning and still seeing nothing. Turning to look at my child’s face but then the kick to the stomach, no longer I could do that anymore. Those of you who are sighted, look to your child, no matter how old they are and appreciate the fact you can see their smile and joy in their eyes.

 

It’s taken me twenty years to learn to adapt to the world of no vision, but it’s no easier today than it was twenty years ago, only I’m not as afraid now. I have learned to do so much thankfully and I’m learning from my Husband who is also blind and my friends who also have no sight.

 

When I went blind my ex Husband was sighted and old Bloggets will know weeks after I went blind my parents died, so I had no one. I didn’t want to join groups where by people told me I could do anything sighted people could do. I hated those people. To me they were patronising. Lacking in understanding, though I am sure they thought they were doing their best. But they weren’t. I was grieving but the only person who died right at the beginning, was me. Though I still was walking around and breathing, though breathing was difficult for me. Shallow, shaking and short!

 

I, go through stages now days when I’m simply bored of blindness. It’s a colourless life. there are no shapes, shadows or smiles. Friendly faces or flowers in summer time. Golden leaves in Autumn, snowflakes and snowdrops or robins in winter and little lolloping lambs in Springtime! Not through the windows of my eyes anyway. But today I, have hope something I didn’t have ten years ago. But hope is taking so long. Where will I be in ten years’ time? Will I be seeing the words I’m writing on my lap top? Will I have had the honour of seeing my unborn so far grandchildren? Will I be able to shop for clothes I want, rather than what they sound like on line or what I’m told to feel and buy? Browsing the shops, something I know all of my friends who are blind dream of doing.

 

Let’s see where we all are in ten years’ time. For those of you who are losing your sight, for those of you who don’t believe you ever will and for those of you who are perfectly sighted, let’s all have hope. Technology now days has moved on so every day life is better, but I will gladly forget tech to be able to see a garden full of butterflies, birds, colourful bushes and blooms.

  

 

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